Attention Whore

It’s not that I’m clingy, because I’m not…at least, I don’t think I am.
But I am needy, as much as I pretend not to be, I really am.
And it’s not that I like the attention – I NEED it.
Without it, I feel neglected. Not just neglected, but unloved.

If you can’t voluntarily pay attention to me, I see it as proof that you don’t give a fuck.
And I won’t reach out for the attention because I don’t want to be perceived as needy and I’m afraid that if I reach out, that’s what people will see me as.
So I don’t do it.

But if I don’t initiate contact, it will never happen.

I’m just tired of people being more important to me than I am to them.
And I’m tired of loving people that don’t love me back.

I’m tired of feeling unloved.