Drawing.

Thank you everyone for all of your supportive notes about that psychopathic bitch.  Geard has an appointment with a Lawyer next Monday to work out what he’s going to say etc.  He’s away this week with work, I think the distraction will be good for him because he’s having a pretty tough time with it.

We had a big fight last Friday night because I wanted to check my FB and OD for the first time all week.  As mentioned before I hadn’t had a second to myself all week.  He said "Fine.  Leave me on the couch again it’s where I’ve spent my week anyway."

Now I DID feel bad this entire week because I’d been coming home so late (8-8.30ish) and he’d be sitting there on the lounge watching tv or on the computer just playing around bored.  But I’ve begged him to join a gym or go and hang out with mates, just don’t wait around bored for me because I feel so bad.  But he insists that he doesn’t care and he’d rather be here.

Anyways when he came in later I was leafing through a Women’s Health Magazine that I’d bought FOUR days ago and hadn’t even had a chance to open yet and he got mad.  Called me selfish and told me I didn’t care etc.  I got really upset and tried to explain that I hadn’t even been having a shower after I came home from the gym and I’d been late to work every morning because I hadn’t been able to make my lunch the night before because I’d been spending time with you because I felt bad.  This seemed to offend him more than anything else.  

I was crying heaps because I had been trying really hard to balance everything and when he calmed down he grabbed me, I pushed him away but he held onto me and told me he was sorry.  He didn’t mean it he was just so upset and messed up with what’s going on and he really needed me.  He said I’m sorry I’ve put so much pressure on you, but you’re the only one I can talk to about it and I got upset because you haven’t been here. 

He said he honestly didn’t mean it and he’s been so proud of me how hard I’m working at the gym.  It’s hard to stay mad at him when he’s got so much going on.  I just wish sometimes he understood a little better on how badly I try to balance things.

Other than that we had a really really good weekend.  I’m a bit sad that he’s away this week.  Well ok, I always am, but I feel so close to him at the moment and I feel like this are finally better.

So I finished my first attempt at drawing a portrait.  I’m fairly happy with it.  You’ll have already seem it if you’ve got me on Facebook;

I don’t know how to fix it up in photoshop so you can’t see all the lines as harshly.  It’s not so defined, but because the scanner picks up a lot of lines that the eye can’t see.  But yeah onto my next challenge :).

I’ve gotta put in for some new jobs today.  I haven’t looked in ages and I need to get out of Rivers.  I’m done with asshole customers talking to me like I’m nothing, or a moron.  Jas just came back to work with us from Jeans West.  The pay was shit, hence why she came back, but she said it was so much fun, people were nice and she didn’t walk out of work every night stressing and feeling defeated.  I want that!

Anyways I better get to it x