i fall asleep in the arms of my past

I don’t mean to be so pitiful me, but why does everything have to be so damn hard? When are things just going to work out? When are pieces going to start falling into place and what I do start making sense again? When do I stop hurting myself and everyone around me? FUCK! Why can’t I be happy like a child? Why can’t I be content and have just some peace? Why can’t I find someone to love? Why can’t I love? Why can’t I fit in for once? For once, I’d like to really belong and feel like I’m accepted and loved and comfortable. I want to feel like the space is mine and I belong to it. I don’t want to be different. I don’t want to be unique. I don’t want to be special. I just want to be a college kid worrying about juries and papers and pop quizzes. I just want to be able to live my life and be happy. I just want to stop being afraid all the time. Can’t I go back to high school where I belonged and things were simpler and rosier? I seriously wish I could have a mental break and return to the mentality of a four-year-old. Just for a little while. Can’t I go back to the days of the concerts and diner runs at 2am? Please.

For about four years I’ve hated this town
There’s so much I just want to get out
Since graduation was long ago
Please somebody get me out of this hole

Cause I don’t want to get stuck in here
When I am thirty-four just talking about high school years
No I don’t want to be there and I feel so stuck right here
Back and forth side to side oh my dear

My foot to the floor I will drive to the place
Where I can kick it with friends through the night
A place well talk about now and the past what the future holds
Hanging out with not much to do
Just aimless with each other is what we do

Cause this ain’t where it’s at
My friends will second that
And I gotta admit sometimes it’s pretty sad
But it’s like we’re our own brat pack
We’re always kicking back, nobody can take that
That is that, it’s like it’s all we have

Whooo whooo ya oh come on

Say oh, oh, get on the floor
Dance till you got no more
I know it’s there somewhere
Don’t worry, I’ll be there
To rock the party all night
To rock you till there’s light,
Our fists in the air
Fighting a good fight

Cause we were singing along to Peter Gabriel Sledgehammer song
You know it’s clear that tonight we belong in this place
So I stand back to reflect in this town I hate
At least just for a second I think I might stay

This ain’t where it’s at
My friends will second that
And I gotta admit sometimes it’s pretty sad
But its like we’re our own brat pack
We’re always kicking back, nobody can take that
And that is that

So I’ll run away to the hopes that I have
That still I fall asleep in the arms of my past
And when I wake so helpless and thinking of that just lay back down

Again, everyday

So maybe later today I’ll know
What I will do with my life as I know it
Maybe for now I’ll drive back to that place where I belong
And hope to God it hasn’t changed

This ain’t where it’s at
My friends will second that
And I gotta admit sometimes it’s pretty sad
But its like we’re our own brat pack
We’re always kicking back
Nobody can take that no no no

This ain’t where it’s at
My friends will second that
And I gotta admit sometimes it’s pretty sad
But its like we’re our own brat pack
We’re always kicking back
Nobody can take that
That is that it’s like its all we have

Brat Pack ~ The Rocket Summer