all these imaginary friends

So I didn’t write yesterday and I wasn’t gonna write today, but I need something. Something that WoW is not fulfilling at the moment. Going out with your friends shouldn’t cause as many problems. I had no problems with anyone there but my presence caused multiple problems for others. Jay’s coming from a good place, but Jenn may be right. Let me explain. It all started with Jay inviting me to the bar last night…..

Everyone was going to be there and Jay invited me to go along. Jenn got upset with Jay because of it. She knew that Melissa would be mad if I went because I would “disrupt” her life. And she didn’t want to have to listen to Mel complain about it later. I gave her an out. I was already drunk from dinner and I told her if she didn’t want me to go, I wouldn’t and I wouldn’t take offense. She kept saying she didn’t want to tell me I wasn’t allowed to go but she didn’t want there to be trouble. She said I was drunk and was more likely to start a fight. I promised her and Jay that I wouldn’t; I would just ignore Melissa. But she said that it would still upset Mel and hence upset her. But Jay wanted me to go and I really wanted to go too to be honest. I wanted to hang out with my friends and have a good time.

So I went and ignored Melissa, and her boyfriend and her parents. I told Jason I wouldn’t be rude to them, but I wouldn’t go up and start a conversation with them because I knew that would piss her off. And I did ignore them all. I talked with Lunchie, Joey and even Connors for a long time. Jay and I talked for a while too. Melissa seemed to have a pretty good time as far as I could tell. Jenn didn’t seem to happy though. Jay told me it was in part because he basically told her she wasn’t being a good friend to me and she was enabling Mel. I think she was also a little upset that he wasn’t paying much attention to her because he was keeping an eye on me. I was a little drunk. I also may have made a few drunken phone calls too. But I only remember talking to John, Brian and Mike. Mike kept telling me to call him when I was sober. And speaking of Mike, he left me a voicemail Friday night when I was asleep and he said that he missed me a lot. I thought it was cute!!!

But best line of the night, from Dustin the bartender – “When you’re trying to be inconspicuous, don’t say the word ‘sex’ so loud.”

Hold it together, birds of a feather,
Nothing but lies and crooked wings.
I have the answer, spreading the cancer,
You are the faith inside me.

No, don’t
Leave me to die here,
Help me survive here.
Alone, don’t remember, remember.

Put me to sleep evil angel.
Open your wings evil angel.

A-ah.

I’m a believer,
Nothing could be worse,
All these imaginary friends.
Hiding betrayal,
Driving the nail,
Hoping to find a savior.

No, don’t
Leave me to die here,
Help me survive here.
Alone, don’t
Surrender, surrender.

Put me to sleep evil angel.
Open your wings evil angel.
Oh.
Fly over me evil angel.
Why can’t I breathe evil angel?

Put me to sleep evil angel.
Open your wings evil angel.
Oh.
Fly over me evil angel.
Why can’t I breathe evil angel?

Evil Angel ~ Breaking Benjamin