RIP Matt

I found this, too.

Matthew G. Zuidema, 18, of PA and a former XXXXXXXXXXXX resident from 1984-1998, died Sunday, Mar. 23, 2003 in PA. Born in XXXXXXXXXXXX, he was a son of Kenneth J. Zuidema, with whom he resided, and Susan of N.C. In addition to his parents, he is survived by a sister, Jessica; a brother, Mark, at home; maternal grandmother, Jessie of FLA.; a paternal great-grandfather, Matthew of N.J. Calling hours will be held on Friday, Mar. 28, from 1-2 p.m. in PA. Funeral services will follow at 2 p.m. at the funeral home. Memorial donations may be made to the Humane Society or to Camelot for Children.

I went to that service. He was my childhood friend. Died from heroin overdose. He wasn’t depressed or trying to kill himself. There was a baby book sitting on a table surrounded by pictures. I was on almost every page of the baby book. So was Dave. It helped having Dave there. I watched him grieve and I could cry too. But I’m still mad at Matt. Mad for stealing that candy on Halloween. Mad for never letting me kiss him like he promised when we were 5. Mad for being such a jerk as he got older. Mad for getting back on the right track and screwing it up on heroin.
I’m just mad and I still can’t breathe.