It’s Been a While 2
Zack and I were talking about what you’d need to hook a computer up to a TV as I wanted to play the Sims but couldn’t see it on the monitor of my laptop.
One of the new guys cut in. I looked at him. I thought, hey, he’s got one of those puffy coats with the stripes on the arms like I seen in grade school. Also he’s a bit odd, cutting in like this and all…
He was telling Zack and I he had a TV back home that you could hook up to a computer. I asked him did he bring it with him, to which he said “no” to which I answered back, good-naturedly, “A great lot of use you are.”
As time went on and Zack graduated on to take up his life, Larry and I hung out more and more.
He liked me, in fact, the evening prior to Zack leaving about which I was clearly sad, he came up to me and sat down next to me and said something along the lines of. “I know you are sad that your friend is leaving… But, I’ll be your friend now if you want.”
It’s little things such as this, random memories, fleeting snatchs of kindness or just being one hell of a good shit, that make me want to weep for everything that was lost and what never had a chance to be.
By the 4th of July I realized that I fancied Larry quit a bit more than just someone to hang out with. Horrorific, to my prudish self, questions of, is he a nice kisser… and other pondering if he was good at other things related to but far advanced from kissing
I couldn’t get him out of my head. He took up residency and was everywhere my thoughts went, sometimes a sweet distraction from the mounting unrest and discontent brewing among the clients.
Several clients and I had talked and we sorted out that what we wanted to do was meet far away from the prying ears and eyes of the staff who managed to show up at all our after hours gatherings, sos they could listen on us I guess. No matter how on the down low we thought a given plan was, there would be staff coming in the door of the place we were eating and sitting down at tables near ours.
Well as this is already going on a long book, I’m thinking I’ll split all this into several entries to start with, they found out about my devious plans. and kicked me out. I will cover this in more detail but that is for another entry.
I was a “threat” to client well being and was treated like a federal inmate who required one on one supervision as I was rushed through the checking out process. This, as you all will see later was a big bunch of B.S. I even had one instructor write me after the fact to say she and several other instructors were forced to vote for my removal.
I was heart broken. I was meant to have lunch with Larry and he called the apartment to see if I were ill or something. All I could do is sob down the phone at him to tell him I had to go and I’d explain everything later if I could.
When I got home that was the first thing I did. I Emailed him and explained everything and said that if he wanted to write me off completely and all that I would understand it.
But. He didn’t… For better or worse, he didn’t…