Chuckle of the day

I got these from a local newspaper … they were printing amusing Classified ads:

These are actual newspaper ads. 

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 years old. Hateful little dog. Bites.

FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor’s dog.

FREE PUPPIES… Part German Shepherd, part stupid dog.

FREE GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. Neutered. Speaks German.

FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG. Looks like a rat… been out a while… better be a reward.

COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED . . .  Also 1 gay bull for sale.

NORDIC TRACK $300 Hardly used . . . call Chubby.

GEORGIA PEACHES, California grown – 89 cents lb.

JOINING NUDIST COLONY! Must sell washer and dryer $300

WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE. WORN ONCE BY MISTAKE. Call Stephanie.

And the best for last:

FOR SALE BY OWNER: Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000 or best offer. No longer needed, got married last month. Husband knows everything.

Ok, I’m going to hack up a lung now!  *waves*

*hugs all around*

Much love!