It was good.

As I was half-praying, half-sleeping this afternoon on a couch, I had a vision. The half-praying part was about Amber, and I was praying to love her well — but it felt incorrect to pray that. I prayed, ‘what do i do with this love, god?’ Suddenly a huge, beautiful explosion with many colors and fast moving flames appeared, like the big bang happening in my head. Then just as suddenly it shrank down to the size of a baseball, still flaming and moving within its orb, but now very contained and small.

‘so what do i do with it,’ I asked, again half-sleeping, half-praying. He directed me to throw it up to him to deal with.

So now I will no longer pray for us, or her in that form. Now I will move on. But the love is still there, with him; and no longer with me.