¡My conquistador!

I just read Malachi last night, and it began with a very sad statement.

“I have loved you,” says the Lord. But you say, “How have you loved us?”

I imagine God speaking in a very soft, sad tone. If I were God, I’d probably go into a state of depression. People could then say, “God has left us,” and they’d be right. The cosmos — my creation — would slowly run it’s course as I sit in the middle of it all, wonder and awe surrounding me, repeating it over and over again, letting it bounce off the ends of the universe, echoing

“How have you loved us?”

echoing

“How have you loved us?”

The I’d get angry and turn off the lights and destroy everything, and then I’d hate myself afterward.

So, it’s a good thing God doesn’t have a fallen nature. There would be no basis whatsoever for love. All things, relative.

I wrote to Perfection today. “

Lord, may I be honest with you? It’s a struggle to feel like I’m not a loser most of the time. And I can’t imagine not letting myself get in the way of any type of plan you have for me and a woman, and I am severly afraid of that. I wouldn’t have the slightest clue on how to be in a relationship with you in my mind, and it hurts to say it.

” And as I finished the last word, the page I had been writing on slipped out of the notebook as if it had never been attached, and then I heard the Lord say,

“I make all things new.”