Of the Aura.

Cliff has returned to the states. Only been a few days, so I haven’t hung out with him yet, but it also means he was awake to IM me this morning. Mentioned taking Russian this semester at county. I can only guess why; he already finished his two degrees at Drew. That’s right: I used a semicolon, bitches.

I’ve been using the metaphor of the dark clouds lately. Or dark wind, some favorite terms of mine. Recognizing darkness is important, but just as important is recognizing light. There is no darkness around me today. While the sun shines nicely today, the light I feel seems to be coming from within. Reminds me of the same sense of empowerment, of Oneness, that I felt when I first started going to this college years ago. I can describe it best as an aura, a feeling of emitting positive energy. Maybe it can be sensed, maybe it can’t be sensed, only an empath could tell me.

This marks the first time I’ve taken fall classes in four years. It also marks the first time I’ve been a full-time student in, well, longer than four years. As I should take pride in, it also marks the first time I’m going to school full-time and working full-time. This challenge doesn’t intimidate me. In fact, it excites me that I’m capable of it. There’s still work to be done, but I’m feeling rather content with myself. I’ve set a lot of small achievable goals, and now I’m tackling slightly bigger, achievable goals.

If anybody’s morbidly curious about my schedule, I exported a PDF of it from a spreadsheet I made in google docs. Otherwise, Tuesdays are the only day that is a little weird. I have an 8 AM class and a 5 PM class. If I had a shit-ton of things to do, I would have a shit-ton of time to get things done. But on the first day of classes, I’ll probably just read the first chapter of statistics, bone up on Linear Algebra for tonight, and then freaking go home and play Everquest2 until 4PM. Oh wait, I stand corrected; the night class is at 6:30.

Made some plans with the ex to drop by Saturday and drink together. Somehow during our relationship, we never actually got around to doing it. She’s also never gotten past a light buzz. I prefer shots, but she has a more sensitive tummy. So, she has a date with smirnoff orange vodka, and fanta orange soda. It’ll go down like nummyjuice. And don’t worry, I’ve already made the mental decision to maintain boundaries. I’m pretty self-aware when I drink. I’d argue most people are aware of what they’re doing when they imbibe, and only do what they’d want to do anyway. That whole “Oh, but I was drinking and didn’t know what I was doing” is a bullshit excuse to get away with things they’d otherwise feel guilty about or be too chickenshit to do sober.

(Unless you’re a friend of mine who claimed she could drink us under the table, then blanked on the events of the evening. Don’t worry, your secrets are safe with us.)

Regardless, it’s go-time. Like a boss.

Log in to write a note

Go time. That reminds me of Cameron.

Ryn: Lol. Yep, I joined the club. I quit Facebook a few months back, and I won’t be getting back until tenth grade ends. I’ll save that link for later. Meanwhile, keep your butt parked there, okay?