On Pink Slips.

I was all ready to head to sleep early again last night when Liz, Cliff, and Erik showed up. Liz said she had a chick she wanted to introduce to me. I told her I was going to bed in two hours. She said it wouldn’t take that long. So, Liz introduced me to Rosie. It was Cliff’s idea, as he remembered me complaining of dumb, unemotional pets. I didn’t really like Rosie and didn’t want anything to do with her. *shrugs* I don’t like birds. Cliff had to agree, he doesn’t like birds, either.

I was thinking the other day about Cliff’s pickle. You know, the one he got me for my birthday. What’s the best gag gift I could get someone? For whatever reason, knee pads came to mind. Of course, it’s a lady’s choice whether she wants to bend over a lot, or whether she’d like to additionally invest in a bib.

We went out to eat, because we had nothing better to do. I just ate chips because I didn’t have any money on me, and nothing inspired me. Somehow, we got talking about pink slips. Now, we all know what a pink slip is. We don’t know why the slip is pink, but whenever you get fired, the slip informing you of this is usually pink.

We started wondering what else a pink slip could be. Falling during sex? “Arg, we had a pink slip last night and I bruised my cock!” Cunnilingus? “Hey baby, mind if I give you a pink slip?”

For whatever reason, Erik thought it would be a good idea to ask our waitress what she thought. It’s amusing to watch someone go from standby conversation mode to “Oh god, he’s giving me independent, inappropriate thought” mode. She seemed calm, though I noticed her cheeks were beat red. He later explained to her the “Turkey Baster”.

(When Erik was younger, his mom told him that if he didn’t have kids, they’d find a girl, and impregnant her using a turkey baster.)

I’ve concluded Liz has an inverted sense of character. For whatever reaosn, when our waitress came and left initially, she said, “I don’t like her.” I really didn’t sense anything wrong with her. Contrast this with all the people Liz considered “good people”. Us aside, they’re all kind of dumbasses.

(Of course, we kind of forced our friendships upon her? Eh, it’s dynamic. Liz has shitty friends.)

Let’s see, I talked about yesterday. What else…

I’m wearing a sweater. I am warm. Damn it. Whenever I dress warmly, it gets warmer out. And when I don’t, it gets colder out. I should just start walking around nakie, then we’d have an apocalyptic blizzard. If I bought fur underwear to keep my tender bits warm, and wore multiple layers, we’d have record heat.

Is there even such a thing as fur underwear?

Oh, I saw Lauren in the restaurant. Someone I graduated with. I gave her a friendly raised eyebrow. I have a policy of not bothering people I went to high school with. I meant to annotate this in my journal but I’m freaking lazy with a pen lately.

I got more sleep than I did the night before, I woke up later, and guess what. I’m less motivated, and more tired. Go figure.