Paternal Inability to Communicate.
I had a very curious conversation with my dad this morning which really epitomized his lack of communication. I’ll be paraphrasing, but you’ll get the idea. I wish I was making some of this up.
Dad: “You know, Cliff can’t stay here all day.”
Me: “Why not?”
Dad: “This is a condo. We don’t live in a house anymore.” (Thank you captain obvious.)
Me: “What’s your point?”
Dad: “Well, the living room is where I hang out. We don’t have two living rooms.”
Me: “You know, if there’s something on TV you’d like to watch, we’d be more than happy to vacate.”
Dad: “You should take him home. You know, get him at some later point when you’re going to be playing video games.”
Me: “Why do you want me to get rid of Cliff?”
Dad: “I don’t want you to get rid of Cliff.”
Me: “You just said you want me to take him home and then get him at a later date.”
Dad: “Right.”
Me “…So why do you want me to get rid of Cliff?”
Dad: “I didn’t say that.”
…
My mom’s cool, she goes about her business. She likes Cliff. I can not for the life of me figure out what my dad’s problem is with Cliff. As far as his attitude goes, he does literally spend most of the day just sitting in the living room, with the TV on in the background, reading. No, doesn’t really watch the TV.
Me: “You know, you don’t need to be afraid of Cliff. You live here! You can sit and read the newspaper, it’s not a big deal.”
Erik’s parents are far more direct. If they want to watch a movie, they’ll say, “We live here. We’re going to use our big-screen TV.” Erik’s dad will sit down with his balls hanging out, and they’ll use their damn TV! My dad’s far more passive-aggressive, preferring me to just get rid of Cliff. Dude, show some respect.
What really kills me is if I take him home, he’ll then make fun of me for being in my “cave” all day. I learned years ago to just tune my dad out. What is it, dad, take my friend home, or stay in my cave?
Neither. Finish college, get a fabulously paying job, get your own pad, and do whatever the fuck you want. That’s what I’d do… LOL! I can understand your frustration with your Dad, though. I love brutal honesty, myself. ;p
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I think your dad should go to the doctor. It seems as though he’s losing his hearing. If it goes untreated for a while it could be permanent! (Okay, too late for that..)
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parents..you cant understand them at all
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I hate when parents try to give you the verbal runaround. Like we don’t see right through it? Grr.
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My dad can shake hands with your dad, Timmy.
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my dad was like erik’s dad. he would sit in his underware and not care (my dad was 350lbs too). he would blow his nose and scratch his balls. LOL
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Well honestly, I think it is more respectful of both you and Cliff that he confront you about any issues that he has with Cliff being there when he’s wanting to “watch” tv. Further, often when people say they’re “watching” tv, they’re really just listening to it while doing other things, which is what your dad is doing. Maybe he just doesn’t want to have to read somewhere else, in silence
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Either way, I do admit that he is being rather nebulous with his request.
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I think some men go through a transformation when they have kids that turns them passive-aggressive. Mine went through it at 6 months. ~
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Hmm. Why NOT get your own place? *curious*
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Your dad sounds very much like how my mother was, back in the day. And that is why I would go insane living with her at this age. Kudos for being capable of tuning him out. That must take quite a bit of patience.
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Hot damn. That sounds familiar. Time to vacate sanity.
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random note: this entry in my opinion gave me some of the best advice. about the cave thing. cause i get that too. so thanks =]
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does he really sit with his balls hanging out or is that just an expression?!
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