Ballism™

Nothing screams virility and power like a large pair of low-hanging testicles. They sway from side-to-side, mocking everything in their path. They rebel against their neighborly organs who insist on remaining safe inside the body. Female “ovaries” shy away from confrontation, hiding deep inside their body. The average human probably doesn’t even know where the ovaries are! Can you point them out offhand?

Balls are a symbol of power. When little boys are growing up, if they lack courage or strength, they are told to GROW A PAIR. A pair of what? A PAIR OF BALLS. If a boy is weak, he will be chastized, and accused of lacking his balls. All puny females are guilty of ball-envy. Puny females do not take pride in their insignificant ovaries. In admiring a strong female, whether emotionally or physically, we do not say, “She’s got ovaries.” No, we say SHE’S GOT BALLS.

And rightfully so! The status of having balls is of the highest order in society. The Patriarchy lasted for aeons based solely on the strength of testicular fortitude. It is difficult for any puny female to sustain any position of power. How can she? She doesn’t have any balls! It takes balls to be the head of a household and inflict discipline amongst your familial minions. If you have no balls, YOU HAVE NO POWER.

Isn’t the penis usually thought of as a source of a Man’s strength? A juicy, erect phallus pointing straight at a moist, glistening punani? Our very nature dictates punanul domination. Yet, this has nothing to do with the penis. What is it that’s really dominating a puny female when she’s in throws of ecstasy? Balls. What is that noise you hear when a Man is rightfully penetrating his wife’s punani? Balls slapping against her body! Lesbians may fashion themselves a dildo and pretend they have a penis, but they can’t pretend to have balls.

A Man is still a Man without his penis. Seven inches, three inches, zero inches, it does not matter. A Man can wear a strap-on, and he’ll be just the same Man, if not a better Man, because his dildo can not go flaccid. Puny females can wear strap-ons and pretend they have a penis. They miss the point of being a Man. A Man without a penis still yearns for female flesh, a Man without a penis can still use his fingers or his tongue. So long as a Man still has his balls, he’s still a Man. But remove his balls, and he is nothing. His sexual desire wanes, his drive despires, and his spirit is prostrated. He is no longer a Man, but a eunuch.

Without balls, the penis can not function. What is it that drives those powerful Thunderous Erections™? Balls! The penis is merely a prop, a gimic. It juts out in front, distracting you from the real power. The penis is nothing more than a facade of power, a guise. It rises and wanes based on the whim of his Masters. Balls are what make a Man strong, balls are what give a Man courage to venture into the unknown, balls are what give a Man the BALLS to dare to stand on his feet rather than die on his knees! If you can’t stand up for what you believe in, you haven’t got any balls!

It if often pointed out how delicate a Man’s balls are. They are thought of as a weakness. This is the very essence of masculinity, of humanity. Naked and vulnerable, we strive to conquer the world around us. Why? BECAUSE WE’VE GOT BALLS! It’s scary out there! We could be eaten! We could fall flat on our face! We won’t always be prepared, and we won’t always have an army of support behind us. But if you have balls, you can succeed.

Teabagging is the ultimate form of dominance and submission. Ancient warriors would teabag their enemies to flaunt their victory. Defeated, the prostrated warrior would open his mouth and let his victor’s balls drop into his mouth. Pungant and sweaty from combat, he would taste his victor’s might, and gently massage the superior victorious balls. It is considered dishonorable to disarm a Man’s balls during teabagging, punishable by immediate death. He has already lost, he already understands that the teabagging is a form of trust. Licking his victor’s balls is considered an acknowledgement of his superiority, and his superior balls. This tradition continues today with post-wedding teabagging rituals. After a ceremony, the puny female lies prone and licks her husband’s balls, acknowledging that HE is the Alpha Male, she is the beta female, and she will submit to him and his balls.

Fellatio is typically thought of as a phallocentric activity. Put the penis in your mouth, make it grow, and have him spurt down your throat. This is, at heart, degrading to the Superior Man. A Man is far more than his silly little penis. Proper fellatio is to make love to the entirety of a man’s body. His thighs, his chest, his arms, his shoulders, his neck, his back, his bum, his sides, his tummy, his face. And more importantly, his balls. If a puny female wishes to express her gratitude for being allowed between a Man’s thighs, she must nuzzle, caress, suck, and lick his balls with vigor and enthusiasm. To do otherwise is to insult the privilege of being allowed to be so close to his balls. Fellatio without proper ball worship is effectively just sucking dick.

Look at what puberty does to otherwise androgenous boys and girls. Girls grow breasts and menstruate. Their ovaries drop eggs once a month and their uteruses become sources of pain, misery, and emotional calamity. Some puny females remain little girls longer, retaining their innocent sanity and being otherwise pleasant human beings. But such things do not last forever. Eventually, they stop being innocent and become irrational sacs of bloody discharge. To be a woman is bleed, to moan, to complain, to be a ranting, raving bitch! She knows she has no balls, so she tries to prostrate her husband as much as possible, nagging at every chance, hoping she can someday slay the power of his balls. A Man has no need for such foolish drama, preferring a calm, relaxed and pensive state.

Yet, puberty is not enough for puny females. Physical changes aren’t enough. To be female is to be prim, to clean, to shave, to wax, to pluck. To wear make-up, to giggle submissively, to act stupid, to degrade yourself to a sexual object. If she does not, she is shunned by her critical puny female comrades. She is not accepted as a woman. What does a Man have to do to be a Man? We grow a little hair, just like puny females. Our voices drop, but nothing spectacular happens. A Man does not need to do any of these shallow things. That’s because we’ve got balls. All a Man has to do to be a Man is growl deeply, heft his supple ballsac and proclaim, “I’VE GOT BALLS, BITCH!”