Stress Builds.

Nobody reads my exerbabble. Oh well, plenty of stuff people post that I just can’t bring myself to read. It is mostly for my own annotation, more than anything else. Plenty of times I’ve looked back on my own logs to verify what I’ve done. To see progress in very simple terms, to see that I can lift x lbs more than I could, that feels a lot more real.

Post-class, in the lab, feeling tired. I stayed up late last night. Oopsie. Fell asleep fast because I masturbated for the first time in a week. There’s those papers I have to do. Part of me is thinking I should just start writing. That’s kind of how I am. Just write, then find the appropriate things to back my shit up later.

I don’t know. I feel like I can’t find anything. It makes me feel very dumb, and we know how my brain can be my own worst enemy. It’s process. Who do I ask to help me, the writing center, or someone in the library? I hate bothering people with dumb questions. Part of me thinks it’s from lack of trying. Just keep plugging. I’m bright, no? If I keep at it, dumb luck will save me? ..Right?

Damn you research papers. Plus I have a book to read this weekend. I’ll have to skim like a mofo. Well, at least my lifting is going okay.

Girls smell nice. I love the vapor trail girls leave behind. If I happen to cross behind a girl, I’ll smell her for a split second.

I wasn’t going to do sudoku this month, in favor of NaNoWriMo, but I need to relax myself. I won’t be doing any writing for my novel until I get home later tonight.

Then there’s registration. The times there’s group registration, I have class. I think I’ll just talk to my yoga teacher. She’s the one that signed the change of major form. She’s nice. I already have everything plotted out, I just need a signature.

Sleep. I can’t fall behind on sleep. *yawns* Priority one is finding sources for my own paper, as I HAVE to get in some sort of outline tomorrow. Nothing fancy. Just keep it simple. On a basic level, it’ll be on how exercising makes you feel better. I’m sure I’ll find a ton of studies on this sort of thing, if I dig deep enough. Come on, Internets!

I want a cuddle break. Alas, all I have is sudoku. Not even close to second-best, but it’ll have to do. Ah. Food. I’ll give myself a half hour to do what I can (time partitioning relieves stress!), then go eat and relax. Typically I feel better doing these things “later” in the day. I don’t know why. If I have four hours to do something, I fret. If I have two hours, I feel better knowing that no matter what, I’m freaking DONE in two hours. Ya know? Something like that. Depends on what I’m doing.

Gotta keep my spirits up. I will get sleep by the end of the day.