All In The Span of Ten Minutes.
Status Report
- Wearing: Colorful blue button-up, with white leaves on it. And red pants.
WinAmp is playing: Lebenzeit – Puhdys
Last ate: one slice of pizza and pears. And I tried the curly fries, they were decent.
Last round of masturbation: Last night. The cumshot video came out really good!
Entry Start Time: 3:29 PM
What I’d like my DiaryName to be: A Pervert, Just Like You.
Based on Esther’s “Senses”.
So after waiting around at the bus stop after my only class of the day, I got on the bus back to Livingston. Sat down, sorta facing the back entrance. Maybe off by a foot. Yeah, I’m facing sideways. Next stop is the ARC. (Allison Road Classroom) I see a swarm of people ready to enter the bus. Amusing myself, I note the gender of everybody that comes onto the bus. “Male. Male. Female. Male. Female.” A girl sat to my left. A guy sat to my right. Then She got on the bus, grabbed the railing above me and stood in front of me.
Okay, you could not have planned this better if you tried. I wasn’t looking for eye candy. She just decided to stand there. I guess she was facing forward, but kinda towards me, too. You know, to get a grip on the railing. I obviously noticed that she had a little stubble on her armpits. But hey, like I care. We don’t all shave every day. I didn’t smell anything, soo. Of course, that’s not what I noticed first. You should know where I’m going with this.
If I had looked straight forward during the bus ride from Busch to Livingston, I would have been staring straight at this girl’s breasts. I quickly noticed this and tried to think of other things to look at. It’s rude to stare! “Okay, there’s the back of the girl next to her… There’s the ceiling… I could lower my eyes slightly and stare at her wonderful waist.. Oh look, I can see her happy trail peaking out from between her skin-tight shirt and her pants. How cute. I could stare at her ass – don’t even think about it. What about looking at the window? Oh geez, there’s too many people in the way, I couldn’t see outside without looking behind me.”
And damn, she has nice boobies. Fit her body nicely. I’m guessing her bra gave her good support because they didn’t jiggle up and down too much. She was wearing a back spagetti string thingie. (Damn you High School rules saying girls can’t wear those.) Black bra, also, I suppose. I think she was wearing either grey or black pants. I think grey. I really wouldn’t know, because obviously, my face wasn’t directly in front of the THE ENTIRE TIME.
I thought, “Wow, I’m going to write in OD about this hottie, aren’t I?” I glanced up at her face. Cute face, yes. But her body is obviously a better feature. So, I suppose I can’t call her a hottie. Black or dark hard, past her shoulders… She had a bag whose strap went right between her boobies.
I tried to avoid looking. I really did. I mean, if you weren’t even attracted to girls, I think you’d have a hard time avoiding them, too. They were RIGHT THERE in front of me. I can’t emphasis that enough. So I thought about who this girl is. Maybe she’d like the boobie-oriented attention. It’s good to feel good about one’s body, right? Yeah, maybe she was displaying them proudly. Or maybe she was just wearing whatever felt comfortable. It’s not her fault she has such nice breasts. Or maybe she’s a man-hater who likes to tempt us and then make fun of us when we fall into her trap. “You stupid MAN, stop STARING AT MY BREASTS WHEN I DISPLAY THEM IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE.”
Kept these thought to myself, of course. She probably had no idea I was even thinking about her. Have boobies long enough, I suppose you’d just get used to the fact that *gasp* I can see her curves! Oh no, I’m such a bad person! (I’m being so sarcastic.) I thought of what Kivudet might say to me. “Talk to her after you get off the bus.” The reply in my head was, “Dude, how the hell do you talk to a girl when you’ve been trying to avoid staring at her breasts all bus ride?”
“Oh hi, I couldn’t help but notice that you had your breasts in front of my face the entire bus ride.”
What kind of idiot comes up with a pick-up line like that?
*Timmy gets bitch-slapped*
***
“Excuse me, could you not be so god damn hot?”
Could you not be a stupid MAN?
*Timmy gets bitch-slapped*
***
“I’d just like to let you know that I thought about going down on you.”
You freak.
*Timmy gets bitch-slapped*
***
“Your boobies. IN MY MOUTH.”
*Girl screams and Timmy gets bitch-slapped*
***
“I’m sorry, I’d like to apologize for being a STUPID MAN. And because I’m a man, that automatically means I was staring at your breasts the entire bus ride. Please smack me now.”
*Girl shrugs and bitch-slaps him*
***
“This might sound really odd, but I’d like to apologize for any accident staring I might have done during the bus ride.”
What accidental staring?
“Um. Your boobies were in front of my face the whole time.”
Dude, what the fuck is wrong with you? If you hadn’t told me, I wouldn’t have known. Now I feel like a piece of meat. You MAN.
*Timmy gets bitch-slapped*
***
Okay, enough of me getting bitch-slapped. My ego hurts just thinking about it. Not as bad as the way I hit myself in the left testicle last night, but pretty bad. (Did you catch that?) For a brief moment, this Girl, in a way, became my Goddess. I suppose I do fall to idol worship now and then. I’ve never been the type too think about celebrities, and I don’t understand people who fantasize or get crushes on them. I like girls I see. Why? Because, if I really wanted to, I could have talked to her. You can’t talk to Spear Me Britney.
Eventually, some people cleared out and she took a seat next to the girl that was to my left. I heaved a sigh of relief. It’s hard trying to be respectful. If I was gay and I just sat there blindly staring at her boobs, thinking nothing of them, she probably would have thought I was some sort of pig. Of course, I’m not gay, and I can’t use that excuse. Somehow, me liking boobs makes it wrong to accidentally look at them. *shrugs* Nonetheless, my conscience wouldn’t shut up unless I made an effort to avert my eyes.
The bus came around to the Livingston Student Center. She got up and exited the bus. As she walked off, I said “Bye…” in my mind. She’s never met me. She doesn’t know me. We’ll probably never cross paths again. But, for those ten minutes, she was all I could think about. Because, hey, it’s rude to stare at boobies.
Funny how girls spend 100’s of hours of time obsession over their boobies and how to present them, then they act all outraged when someone stops to appreciate them.
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They even catch the covert glances, dude. —
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This absolutely cracked me up. I’m in the library and I was literally laughing out loud. People were staring, and I still laughed because this was hilarious.
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The other day in my Health class a very fine specimen of a boy (rude though) stood RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME where I was sitting and bent over to talk to his friend in the next row of seats. His…very nice…butt…was right in my face, LOL. And this guy behind me noticed and tapped me on the shoulder and was like “Enjoying the view?” I turned 12 shades of red…
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Moral: It happens to us too, dammit!
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Damn boobie girl on bus for making Timmy stare rudely at her boobies!! What was she thinking?? Ha Ha 🙂 Anyway the story made me laugh, good times!!
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mm boobies. although for the sake of Zomby, i’ve never spent even tens of hours worrying about the way mine look.. lol. maybe by the time i die i will have, just going bra-shopping. hhmm. hugs,
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hm, i wish that when boys thought this much about boobies, that they would just GROW SOME suddenly and have to walk around with giant c cups flopping in the wind. that would show ya! actually, i dont’ blame ya. i find myself admiring cha cha’s… i have some, but they are stupid. i hate my own boobs. other’s boobs are better. YAY BOOBS… or something… =)
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oh, Timmy. 😛 YOu and your love of boobies. hehe Actually, I don’t think I’d be pissed if I caught a guy looking at my boobs. I’d be more uncomfortable, probably, than anything else. Cause I’m just shy like that. But I don’t think I’d get ticked off about it. Just…a little self-concious blushing, probably. But hey, that’s just me.
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i love men looking at my boobs, to be to honest. I just don’t love it when they don’t compliment them. Then i get uncomfortable and feel self-concious because i obviously don’t have nice boobies because nobody is complimenting them and even *gasp* ridiculing them. Or the lack of them. *eyes you*
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Heeeelllllppppp meeeee…… [desi-ness: marchioness of the impoverished and ex-communicated]
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I don’t get outraged. I fully appreciate the attention. Will read later. :-*
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RYN: Actually, I have a really funny story about that. Someone was driving slow in the left lane, so I rode her ass. Then she slowed down to teach me a lesson about tailgating. Before long we were both driving 30mph on the Interstate. I was outwardly annoyed but inside I was thinking “Touche’, lady. Touche'”.
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Oh Ambassador, with this Entry you are really spoiling us?
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What an excelent explanation. Sometimes, things like that just happen, and there isn’t a thing you can do about it…. sometimes not much you can NOT do about it either…. I’m betting I would have stared at my shoes or out the nearest window anyway. Or I’d have said “hi”, just because I’m always curious about what’s inside someone’s skull, if they match inside and out.
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*bitch slaps you on her behalf* Ooh… but that was kind of fun! Now… bitch slap ME! (heh heh)
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RYN: “Uhhhh” yourself.
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I have the same staring problem at the gym. All the guys stare at each other to compare bodies, but I feel guilty for doing it. But, for some reason, I have no reason cracking jokes about a girls weight…cuz most of them know Im kidding.
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Regarding Mr. Woof’s comment and this entry: Girls like boys to give appreciating looks of our form. We just don’t like seeing some old guy standing next to you in the elevator breathing don your neck, perspiration running down the side of his face, and a mega huge tent aimed in your direction. That’s when we get upset.
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Personally, I’m flattered when people stare at my breasts. Nice to know they’re appreciated. Besides, we stare at crotches, we just don’t admit it. 😉 There’s a group of women in Florida sueing for the right to go topless. Thought you might like to know. *gryn*
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Hi. I’m 42. I’ve been noticing that strange ‘absence seizure’ among men for some time. You know….when they’re expected to be listening or watching for that CROSS TOWN BUS, but are, instead, fixated on your breasts or ass or small of the back, or ankle. Or back of the knee. Or swell of the belly. We are so hungry. And there’s nothing we like better then to look upon, and kiss..
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and lick and mouth those desired parts. Because we are so hungry. But are we ever full? And do we not secretly egg on the fat kids that want to sue McDonald’s for their obesity? And should’nt somebody…anywhere…be responsible for this grand wanting in us. Also…RYN…I find thongs very uncomfortable after a half hour or so. Brazialian c
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Lol. Brazilian briefs are so much nicer
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WHY DID YOU BLOCK ME, YOU ASS?! Good thing I know your password, so I can FIX that, eh? :-p
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The cumshot video came out really good!
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RYN: i practice all the time! lol
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ryn: Sure it’s harder to see anything, but we have vivid imaginations. *gryn* Nose-penii would be pretty entertaining. Would you have an orgasm every time you sneezed? I probably wouldn’t run around naked myself, because that’d be cold and uncomfortable. But it is silly that we can’t, particularly in situations that just beg for nudity, like swimming pools or political conventions.
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Hmm…somehow I didn’t see you as someone into the greek scene 😛 That’s okay, I’m not sure if I am or not.
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oh, praise the heavens…..the great rains that have been plagueing you have stopped! The skies have closed, and you are free to venture the face of the earth again. Praise Timmy! 😛
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Laughing laughing..you write great! Did you ever read “The Fermata” by Nick Baker about the guy that could stop time, so he would stop time, and then undress women and place vibrators on them and redress them and other stuff? It was a fun book.
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i LOVE it when people stare at mine! but personally, i think the non-jiggling thing is a little scary.. *cough – fake – cough*
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I’ve spent my entire post-pubescent life deluding myself that those subtle glances at women’s bodies aren’t detectable. Maybe it’s because I wear glasses for horrible eyesight that I believe they can’t tell when they’re not looking straight at me looking straight at them. Haven’t been slapped yet, though.
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I never understood why 2 pockets of fatty tissue there was any differnt than fatty tissue on thighs or stomachs. Boobs. I never understood them, why do men like them? They are fun if your fruit fly (fag hag) has them and lets me use them as pillows during movies tho. I’m a strange little gay man.
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I’ll bet she probably wouldn’t’ve minded, might’ve even appreciated if you’d said something, as long as it was somewhat tactful. It’s not bad to be stared at, just makes us feel pretty — unless it’s a really hideous guy leering/drooling, then it’s just icky.
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I very much enjoyed this. I would not have bitch slapped you if you said some of those lines to me. Maybe its because my instincts tell me you intend no harm, at least that is the impression I get IRL. It would be interesting to someday read about me except I don’t think I would want to know that I was the subject. I am Odd.
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