Na-Na Land

I feel like that is where I am stuck and it is tough to write OD entries from there, let me tell you.

Starting Friday, I wasn’t feeling well again until just last night. I finally broke down and went to the doctor on Monday, demanding he do something so he put me on some allergy meds. I have no idea if that is what is helping or all of the extra rest I have been trying to get but *knock on wood*, I feel better this morning. Just tired, achy, feverish off and on and my stupid stomach. Last night, it was so bloated I looked like I was about 5 months pregnant (freaked Brian OUT!) but then I took a few Tums and it finally went away.

Also, I share an office with my boss now – have I mentioned that? So, it makes it pretty tough to type out entries or keep up with all of my favs at work. I am typing this entry in Word, very quickly, in between inputting info on a spreadsheet for our tax department. I like what I am doing – it is rather confusing right now though. We prepare a million reports for different departments and executives and everyone wants them in just a little bit different way so right now, it feels like I am doing the exact same report over and over and over again. I just don’t understand how it all ties in together right now so I am giving myself a good 2-3 months to really grasp a better understanding of the point of it all.

And despite feeling rotten, I have been doing a lot more around the house these past 5 days or so – Brian has been working feverishly on our new deck and just got done last night. It is gorgeous – I am so happy I talked him into getting the cedar wood because it just brightens up the backyard and smells so good. Though he got frustrated at many points during the project, you could tell last night he was very proud of himself and happy with the results. But, while he worked on that all weekend and every night after work, I had to make dinner, clean the house, do the dishes, do the grocery shopping and all of the other things Brian would normally do between 2:30 and 5pm when I get home from work. It’s not like I didn’t appreciate him before but now I REALLY get a sense of how busy he can be while I am still at work every day. It makes it so much easier on me when I get home – my time is my own because he has taken care of so much and I am so lucky to have that.

Speaking of lucky – my aunt is going through a really bad time right now with her husband and without getting into too much detail, some shit could be going down soon. I can’t believe it – they have been married 30 years THIS year but you can only take being ignored for so long. The few spare minutes I have had these past few days have been hers – she isn’t telling a soul what is going on except me – not my mom, her sister, not her daughter, her friends, noone – just me. I hope they can work through their problems though I must admit, I never saw what my aunt saw in my uncle. I think Brian put it best when he said he seems like such a joyless person – rarely smiles, never jokes around, never laughs. You really have no idea upon meeting him or spending time with him if anything makes him happy, what he does in life that he really enjoys. That would be tough to live with day in and day out if that is how he is all the time. Brian cracks me up so much and always has, I have spent the majority of our 12 year marriage with tears running down my face from laughing so hard and a smile in my heart and soul. Everyone deserves that, doesn’t they?