Macaroni & Chreese

Yeah, not a type. That’s a brand of macaroni and cheese. Except it’s vegan, and vegans don’t eat cheese. So. It’s chreese. Whatever it was, it wasn’t good at all!! Whole wheat pasta (which for some reason sometimes burns my mouth, like it’s peppery or something? weird.) and chreese. Yuck.

Anyways. I went over to Em’s for a while cuz…well, cuz she asked me to! She’s been kinda in a not-good place lately. And today she was like “So, I have a problem. Can you advise me??” And I said I’d try. Except her problem was that she doesn’t eat. That she’s never hungry. lol. I couldn’t really help her out on that one, I discovered. Especially after realizing that all I had eaten today was a breakfast bar, french fries from Wendy’s, and a cup of banana creme pie pudding. eheh. Oops. So. She was also tired but had stuff to do and couldn’t decide if she should nap or work. And she wanted to hang out. But she couldn’t decide what to do. So. I went over, and we went to the store to get milk (soy) and such and then we made dinner (the mac and chreese. But we ended up not eating that and had vegetarian veggie soup and mini gherkin pickles instead!) and then she did her work while I did some of mine. It’s funny cuz she’ll be in her room on her computer and I’ll be sitting out in the other room, on my computer with stolen wireless access, and I’d msg her on IM and she’d giggle. She’s such a cutie. hehe. Definately Questioning tho. I don’t remember really having to deal with that, to any large degree. I mean, my questioning was more like “oh. hmm. lesbian? maybe i am. *shrugs*” whereas hers is definately “gay? straight? Bi? AAHHHHHH!” :o( I guess I didn’t put too much thought into it. Some thought, I’m sure. But. It didn’t make me insane like it’s making her 🙁 She’s really struggling with it. lah. I’m glad at least that she knows and feels that she can talk to me about it as much as she needs to. She’s just one of those people who can be insecure, and just be like “are you mad at me???” and…and you know she’s not just fishing for acceptance or something. She’s just quite genuine. She makes me smile.

Today is apparently a day for red-heads. Cuz I also walked by L’s house on my way to the allies mtg tonite and she was out with the dogs, yay! I walk by her house a lot, which is actually kinda taking the long way home, but I just try to catch her outside. And today I did. And we talked for a bit and caught up and I told her all about AJ and she told me about school (she has stemmler. Only the GREATEST PROFESSOR EVEEEERRRRRR! hehe. the man is so cool he’s hot. pretty sure he’s gay. cuz he’s just too amazing to be straight. lol. he either has a huge ego or a huge low self esteem issue. but it balances out in that he’s always being like “I am amazing” but he’s also hilarious and witty and such. He’s wonderfully sarcastic. wears a suit every day to class. I mean, pants, shirt, jacket, tie. All of it. Every day. Even in summer. Yet, at other events where you’d expect more formality, he wears jeans and a tshirt. lol. He’s just wonderful, imho.) I promised her I’d email her, so I shall go do that now. Attach some pics of AJ and I.

Talked to AJ at Em’s today. Phone kept cutting off tho and it started to really frustrate me again, which frustrated me even more since I had finally calmed myself down from being so angry at allies. lah. i just get mad cuz. It prevents me from talking to AJ in the way that I’d like to. Oh well. I got to talk to her for a while, which was the most important part. I’m so angry that I can’t go up there this weekend. But looking around my dirty, dirty, DIRTY apartment, I know that I can’t. I need to clean as well as do all my assignments and catch up/get a bit ahead on my assignments or I’m just gonna flounder. These kind of study sessions with Em seem to work ok. We do chatter a bit, but I think that we get more work done together than we would’ve gotten done of we were at our own houses. so that’s good.

wow. I just took a lunesta and it’s not possible that it’s hitting me so fast. i must be tired. but all of a sudden I just feel like i need to lay down. that could do with all the horrible sleep i’ve been getting, lol. but. yeah. so. So. I was in a shitty mood, but then i hung out with Em and that def put me in a better mood (if only cuz I was trying to make her smile…and she just makes me smile automatically…) AND I got to talk to AJ before she went to sleep, so that was nice.

Gonna do a severe breakdown of tomorrow’s MUSTS.
Tomorrow I need to:
1. Clean Apt
kitchen– dishes, clean out fridge, microwave, cupboard change/organise, sweep, vacuum, dry swift, wet swift, mop prn.

bedroom floor– books on shelves, papers in folders

bathroom– laundry in proper bins. toilet bowl thingie into tolet. sweep, vacuum, mop.

living room -vacuum.
Clean Animal cages
Clean catpan (CHANGE LITTER!!)

2. Bills etc
sort thru pile by desk
pay verizon
rent due soon

3. Straighten/organize bookshelves

4. Clean out car

5. School Stuff
Gather all notebooks. punch holes in all handouts to put in binders.
Make cheat sheet for Soc Psy Exam on Monday
Read Ch 26 in Brunners for quiz on Monday
Read Ch27 Brunners
Study Guides Ch 26/27

Figure out teaching stuff for Clinical
Figure out care plan stuff to turn in- demographics and such

6. Shopping
oil for car
Groceries- soda, water, chips, bagel bites, frozen waffles, tv dinners, soft pretzels

7. Laundry

8. Appt to get car inspected (put oil in first!)

8. Sweep-> Vacuum -> Dry Swift -> Wet swift or mob kitchen and bathroom

9. Hang wall-hanging Jay got me from equador

10. Freecycle stuff
broken stereo/boom box
printer
corded telephone
other stuff I’m sure I’ll find thru the day.

Ugh. Enough for now. I feel weird. Restless almost. Maybe meds are just kinda kicking in or something or are starting to. i dunoo.

lah. eros vs thanatos.