When the moment is not right…

…and the timing is unusual…well she wants to be the queen and she thinks about her scene. Well she wants to live her life and she thinks about her life. Pulls her hair back as she screams ‘I don’t really wanna be the queen….’

I should be cleaning my apartment, since I shall be leaving it on Tuesday and I detest coming home to a mess. blah.

Watched M’s kids this afternoon for a few hours while M and E went to graduation and such. Weird to think that next year this time, I should will be graduating. Eep. Weird.

And I was -going- to get some of my resume paper back from her and print up my resume so I can find a stinkin’ job so I can afford to live this summer. *sigh* It’s so damn difficult to do these things, cuz I’m technically working for Dr F, but she’s all scattered and because I am leaving town on Tuesday and because she didn’t have herself together enough to figure out what to have me do last week, I’m not starting with that til the 23rd. And even then, I have no idea when she’ll want me to work, which means having a difficult time telling perspective employers when I can work.

I’ve called several places (2) and one was…well….really rude. And so now I’m afraid to go drop off my resume there. And the other was really nice, so I -will- drop off my resume there, but I’m pretty sure there’s no night shift involved with them. Night shift just makes life easier. Cuz, yeah, it ends up with me not sleeping. But more of all the Everythings that need to be done fit when there are 24 waking hours in a day. *sighs*

hello hello, a place called vertigo…everything i wish i didn’t know…

And. I’ve been trying to get over this whole ‘feeling slighted by my friends’ deal. But. Jay and I were going to go see Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy on Thursday or Friday. And. When I saw him last, he was just too tired and worn out because, ya know, he’s had to work a whole lot on his art stuff.

He’s also spent every night getting completely shitfaced at the bar.

The last time I talked to him, he was -also- complaining that he hadn’t been able to buy his plane ticket to Ecuador yet, cuz he had no money.

So. Beer is free at the bars now??

It’s difficult enough to be slighted for other people or friends or work. But. To be put on hold because of alcohol?

Yeah. Not so much.

And the thing is, I really WANT to go see the damn movie, BEFORE it leaves town. Which, it will most likely be gone by the time I get back on the 17th or 18th. Meaning, there’s today, tomorrow, or Monday. And I don’t think tomorrow works, cuz I think it’s mostly matinees and stuff, and my certificates aren’t eligible for matinees. Plus, I need to do about 6 loads of laundry at some point. And I need to see Em before she leaves, hopefully. And Monday I have therapy at some point, although right now I can’t find the stupid post-it note that tells me when, as well as I promised Kat I’d help her move cuz she needs the use of a car, so I’ll be physically worn out from that. And needing to go to bed early so that I can get up at the asscrack of dawn and drive to my sister’s new house and then as soon as I get there, get in another car and drive all the way to her old house. And she won’t even BE there. I’ll be trapped in a car with her husband, who I’m not overly fond of, and her father in law and brother in law. Neither of which I really know. And, a 9 month old baby who apparently doesn’t tend to want to be in his carseat the entire time. My sister was like “Yeah, he doesn’t stay in it the whole time, so you’ll have to hold him for part of the way…”

WHAT? I so think not. And I so think this is going to cause great conflict. But I REFUSE to travel with a baby not being in a carseat. I can’t believe my sister sometimes. She spent HOW MANY years trying and trying and TRYING to conceive a child. And then she can turn around and do stupid shit like -that-?? Sure. The chances of getting in to a life-threatening accident are somewhat slim. But THERE’S STILL A CHANCE.

*sigh*

Not to mention, I need some sort of dressy clothes to wear to H’s graduation and -none- of my khaki’s fit me anymore, except the pair that has unremovable stains all over them.

I’m not gonna think about this anymore because it’s just making me furious.