Running up that hill

Wedding stuff:

It’s been quite the wedding week. Our magnets arrived and were posted out and have had a good reception. One or two people were touched that we’d even consider inviting them which made me happy in some weird way. We’ve booked a dj for cheaper than the hotel quoted us (only £60 cheaper but still, every penny saved, etc) and we’ve received a quote for our seychelles accommodation and we’ve decided to book that this week as well. We are going here:  http://www.blackparrot.com/home.html   For a week. I can’t wait. We’re not sure about getting married on the actual beach yet, but if we can’t then we love the jetty over the water and we can get married there instead. It’s quite exciting and I’ve been all weddingy all week, just wanting to do loads of other stuff and getting carried away basically.  We’ve also gone through our budget again, as the hotel was more than we’d originally agreed to spend but we’re only doing this once, right? The money is the only aspect that worries me. Even doing this on a budget with my mum paying for the reception catering, it’s still gonna be more than we’d anticipated. It’s the seychelles bit that’s eating up the money. The flights alone (uk – j’burg – seychelles – j’burg – east london – uk) work out to be the same as the hotel for the week!

Kinda weddingy but not really:

I’m off next week to buy wedding lingerie before I try my dresses on. I know the type of dress I want so finding underwear should be easy. But, as much as I want to buy wedding stuff, I don’t want to do this bit. I’ve decided to get my bra size properly measured as I’ve never had it done before and I’m dreading this part. I’ve lost no weight since early january and am feeling like such a fat lump that the thought of getting my top off for some woman to measure me makes me even more stressed than the money does. I know they’re professionals and it’s what they do for a living but god, I don’t wanna get undressed in front of a stranger.

Despite my healthy eating and walking to work every day (at least 2 miles a day, 4 if I walk home as well) I’ve lost nothing over the weight I put on at christmas. What am I doing wrong? I have just under 14 months till the wedding and only 5 weeks till proper dress shopping with Mel and it feels me with utter dread. All these dresses I’ve seen that look lovely and I’m so terrified they’re gonna look terrible on me and I’ll end up getting married in jeans and a t-shirt. Which it wouldn’t matter if I did cos it’s not about the dress, it’s about the vows, etc, etc. I swear, ring on the finger and I’ve turned into this crazy woman who does nothing but think about weddings. I need shooting or something.

Until there is a next time…

xx