Snow Day~Chubby day

It’s snowing and I’m at work, luckily I get to leave early since my car doesn’t have any chains. I want to go home, get into bed, and eat ice cream.

Actually I really don’t need it because I think I’ve gained weight, I’m up to 121 now and last night my brother made a comment that I’m gaining weight. This bothers me because I’ve lost 25 pounds (purely by accident.) December 2003 I got the flu and since then the weight has been peeling off. My lowest was 118 but now I’m at 121.8, I don’t want to get back to 145 again. I really don’t. I’m not anorexic, I really am not, I’m just image conscious. Okay, I count everything I eat and only follow the precise serving size, whether it be 1 cup, or 12 almonds, for me this is a way of life. The world is very superficial and I’m already insecure about myself. What to do! What to do? I really need to go to the gym. I go every weekend and stay for about 4 hours each day and I also walk 18-22 flights of stairs each day, but I guess it isn’t enough. Why do I care???!!!