No Child Left Behind Act for Marching Band
No Child Left Behind: The Marching Band Version
1. All bands must make the State Marching Contest, and all will win the Championship. If a band does not win the championship, they will be on probation until they are the champions, and directors will be held accountable.
2. All kids will be expected to have the same playing and marching skills at the same time and in the same conditions. No exceptions will be made for interest in band, a desire to perform musically, or genetic abilities or disabilities. ALL KIDS WILL PLAY THEIR INSTRUMENT AND MARCH AT A PROFICIENT LEVEL.
3. Talented students will be asked to work on their own without instruction. This is because the directors will be using all their instructional time with the students who aren’t interested in band, have limited musical ability, or whose parents don’t like band.
4. Contests will be scheduled year round, but statistics will only be kept in the 4th, 8th and 11th competitions.
5. This will create a New Age of Marching Band where every school is expected to have the same level of talent and all bands will reach the same minimal goals.
If no child gets ahead, then no child will be left behind.
This is funny…but sad. Is it really that bad? RYN: thanks for your nice note.
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RYN: I think my co-op thinks that they are beneficial. I don’t really agree. I have issues with warm-ups the way they’re done but I don’t really get much of a chance to change it now. We do long tones, lip slurs, 10 scales, interval tuning, sometimes chord tuning and a chorale(usually 3 or more times). I would combine the lip slurs, long tones and interval tuning into one exercise…
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… and run the scales and chorale. I don’t think they need a 25 minute warm-up, but again, its not really my decision. P.S. Thats a great way to put the no child left behind policy.
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That would be funny, if it weren’t so true. :/
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oh, goodness it really is that bad isn’t it? I truly think that Bush’s wife needs to go back into the classroom for a year or two and she may re-think her no child left behind motto. Some ought to be left behind, some beg to be left behind. r
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the last sentence says it all. For every subject
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Good one! Last sentence sums up life in general!
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Sad but true… alas… not looking forward to that stupid law in a couple years when i too will become a teacher.
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ryn: thats a good idea.. I tend to just ask them what they think I’m going to say when I stop… and it’s usually what I just told them to do that they didn’t do. lol. Thanks!
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Gnome. Thanks for the note. How are things going, man? You doing ok? You need to update and keep us informed. Glad to hear from you.
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RYN: I promise, if it wins America’s Funniest Video, I’ll send all my faves an Amazon gift certificate!
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Did you write this? A agree with Ginger Snap – funny and sad!
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