09/18/2012

Today just random things as they pop into my mind.

 Today, for the first time since I have been here, I got up after Jake had left for work. And I got up tired. Yesterday I went to visit two apartment complexes . This is a big step for me because I was driving a new-to-me car, in a totally new-to-me area and using a new-to-me GPS!  It is a TomTom and mine is a Garmin. But they all work basically the same way so all I had to do was make it do what I wanted it to do. Which I eventually did. All this new-to-me stuff tired me out because I found it stressful. Since Fred died, I have noticed that I have days when every little thing seems too difficult to deal with. Today is like this, so, today I am giving myself permission to do nothing.

The other day Jake and I went out to do various things, and last on the list was a stop at Barns and Nobles. There I bought a book called 642 Things to Draw and I have been having a good time with it. One reason I decided to get it was the fact that some of the prompts really force me to look them up to look at details. For example, a bowler hat. I knew vaguely the shape of the top but I had no idea about the brim! I feel having to do this is good for my brain. I was thinking about this and wondering why I found drawing mushrooms {another prompt} so easy when I remembered that for a while, I was really involved in taking pictures of mushrooms. Hmmm, of course I know them. I have spent time lying on the grass in order to get close ups of mushrooms and observing them closely! Another good reason to dig out my camera! While I was there at a real bookstore, I also found How to Cook Everything:The Basics by Mark Bittman. I have been wanting this forever, and although it is much cheaper on Amazon I went ahead and bought it. Art books and cookbooks are the only books I do not buy for Kindle. The reason I want this book is because although I can cook. I don’t think I can cook well so I thought it would be a Good Thing to actually learn the basics. Incidentally, this is a big heavy book so it would be silly to take it back to VT with me and then have to pack it up to bring it back to NC so I am leaving it with Jake when I go.

I think Jake and I are going out to buy groceries when he gets home from work so I believe I will go for a brief nap in preparation!

Anything that’s human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable. When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary. The people we trust with that important talk can help us know that we are not alone. ~Fred Rogers (Mr. Rogers)

You are not happy because you are well. You are well because you are

happy. You are not depressed because trouble has come to you, but

trouble has come to you because you are depressed. You can change

your thoughts and feelings, and then the outer things will come to

correspond, and indeed there is no other way of working.

— Emmet Fox