Sorting This Out
This morning I found myself wishing for a lot of snow on Tuesday — enough snow that class will be cancelled. This led to me thinking seriously about giving up this class. So, here are the pros and cons . They are not in order of importance but just as they tumbled out of my convoluted thoughts. {Many problems become solvable when I write like this.} If I quit this class, no more aggravation from Martino. But, if I am being honest, I know that all this aggravation is not actually his fault but what I am feeling about him and can be cured by an attitude change on my part.
No more dreading the class. Again, this can be fixed by an attitude change on my part AND by not avoiding homework.
This class is causing me stress. I don’t need stress. But, I am not being honest with myself here. Fred was right to tell me that I needed not to give blood any more before surgery in June. That is causing my body physical stress and I DO need to avoid this. But the stress I am feeling now can be avoided by actually DOING my work rather than procrastinating and by an attitude change. I can do attitude changes. I am using stress as an excuse.
This class isn’t fun any more. Well, not everything in life HAS to be fun. If I want to reach my goal of fluency in five years, I have to slog through the not-fun bits, too. And an attitude change does wonders for the fun quotient!
Giving up when something gets hard is the old me and I am not going back there any more. This is completely non-negotiable. I am no longer the person who gives up when learning isn’t easy. The fact that it is no longer easy doesn’t mean that I am stupid. It means only that this is new to me and I have to buckle down and do it.
I found myself saying "But I can work on Italian alone." True, but past experience tells me I won’t. I know I need structure imposed from without.
Past experience also tells me that things always seem the hardest before the breakthough.
OK, I need to find out for sure how many more classes we have. It will give me a goal to work for to see that number getting amaller each week.
And so the bottom line is, I am finishing this class.
{I think there are 12 more classes! I can do 12.} 
QUOTATION: Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.
Robert Brault
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I’m glad you came to that decision before you finished writing this. You can do 12, and you’ll be happy that you did. If you quit, you’ll regret it.
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you’ll definitely be glad you stuck it out!
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mark them off on the calendar and you will see the number shrink right before your eyes. i think you’d regret quitting the class. but i enjoyed reading your determination to finish the class. you’ll take a break over the summer, won’t you? got snow!!!! it’s snowing here but i’m hoping for a change back to rain. take care,
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{{{{HUGS}}} – I admire you SO MUCH for thoughts/processes just like these. Thank you for giving me something to aspire to. 🙂
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You can certainly do twelve. That is completely doable. I know the frustration of wanting to just stop when it gets hard. But you know how rewarding it is when you don’t stop. Look at how much you’ve already achieved!
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Wow, you are a wonder!
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I was going to suggest finding another class, until I got to the end of the entry. Personally, I think you have many reasons to quit, and I’m sure there must be other classes you could pick up instead if the stress gets too much. But you’ve made your decision, and I applaud you for it!
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I admire you for deciding to continue with the class. Quitting would’ve been justified, though, too. But you will feel better about yourself for staying the course, and I’m glad it’s only twelve more classes! hugs, Weesprite
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It is so true that most people will give up and quit before the end, and they never will know if going just one more step could have brought the reward. The trick is to keep on going, keep on slogging through, until the light goes on. Is there somebody in the class that you can study with? I find that if I can discuss what I’ve learned with somebody, I understand it better. Your explaining to us about verbs and stuff is confusing to me, but I’m absolutely sure that it clarifies things in your mind to do so. Good for you in sticking it out. And, as long as you’re on this road, it might be a good idea to revisit why you wanted to learn Italian in the first place. Try to get back those feelings of hope and excitement. Think of how far you have actually come! It’s amazing what you’ve been able to accomplish. Take a minute to pat yourself on the back! You are amazing!
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🙂 good for you Patricia! Yes, I think Fred is right about the giving blood. You need to let your body stock up all its goodness so that you can heal quickly. I think too that when you come back from Italy you will see a huge difference. Apart from that, you are just disadvantaged at the moment because others have been to Italy already. And the thing about the break through… yesprobably. It seems that with language learning you have stages. Stages of new, of getting the hang of it, of suddenly finding everything hard again. Just as with English we can still learn new words, well language learning gets hard again every single time that you move to the next level. I am still learning things in French and I have been speaking the language fluently for the past 10 years. And there are days when I just find it harder to speak – the accent and to remember the right words and the right grammar. I can get away with it though, but I notice that some days its just harder than others.
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Nothing worth having ever comes easy, or so it’s said. I know that’s true in MY life anyway. If you’re like me, you’d be sorry later if you didn’t finish. I’m glad you decided to stick it out. Love to you! ~M
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Wonderful list, and I really like how you are ‘turning your mind’ in it. Yes, I do think that you can do twelve more classes, and that will make the italian trip a lot more fun.
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Wonderful decision. I’m proud that you decided to get it all out and right down your feelings towards all of this. That is a wonderful thing to do.
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You can do 12, we all know you can. 🙂
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I’m like you in the fact that I can work through things when I put my ideas, problems ” on paper “. I am glad you decided to continue with the classes. I think in the long run you would have been sorry if you had quit. You are such an inspiration to me. Hugs, M
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I think that’s a very wise decision. You will be much more able to acclimate to Italian when you go to Italy in a few months by just sticking this out a few more classes. I’m proud of you!
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I like the idea gray tabby had…mark them off of your calendar. 🙂
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I wish I could change my attitude towards school. I’m really not enjoying it at the moment and want to quit, even though this is my final year.
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