News – Self Interested Philanthropy

Middle East

Iraq’s interior ministry has security forces detain beggars and the mentally ill on the streets that could be exploited by militants. The apparent plan is to send them back to their families or to mental institutions. As long as they’re properly cared for, this is a good thing for both denying the militants easy dupes and providing care to those who would otherwise not have it.

Turkish troops roll into Northern Iraq. Interestingly, the US has a very mild response for this, commenting on the likelihood of the Turkish operation being of short duration, as has been promised. There is concern, but obviously it isn’t enough to prompt any real action.

Moqtada Sadr orders a renewal of the ceasefire his militia has been adhering to for the last six months. A good thing. Less shooting = more stability.

Africa

China defends selling arms to Sudan. They say its only 8% of Sudan’s arms imports. Not much reason to continue it, then, is there? Obviously China’s aid isn’t a lynchpin that will leave the country defenseless. Thus it makes a fine minor prod to try and get them to reform.

Asia/Pacific

China expresses regret that the US will be providing its own food for their Olympic athleats during the 2008 Olympics in Beijing. It is quite a knock at China for this to be done, but not unjustified.

Australia will be seeing a visit from US Defense Secretary Robert Gates for talks with the new government in power. One hopes that the current government won’t try as hard as Howard’s did to repeat every mistake the US made in the wake of 9/11, freaking out and kneejerking all over the place.

Europe

With the trouble stirred by Kosovo’s unilateral declaration of independence, the EU is prodding the Serbs to protect the embassy’s in their country from the violence that has resulted.

Americas

With the US showing off how they can shoot down one of their own spy satellites, it seems likely that future satellites could get a bit more stealthy to prevent the very same.

Grey wolves are no longer marked as endangered in the US. Well and good, but I hope hunters don’t go to great lengths to test this.

Are these supplementals a backdoor means to pump up the overall military budget? As some might expect, I wouldn’t be surprised.

Explainer looks at the expense of shooting down that rogue satellite.

General

The elderly who nap during the day may be more prone to stroke than those who don’t. I’d say its fairly obvious that this isn’t necessarily true for those who have trouble sleeping and are tired from that.

On the other hand, a six minute nap could improve memory for the general public. So voluntary naps good, unintentional dozing bad.

Governments may try and levy sanctions on ISPs that don’t take substantial steps to stop internet piracy on their bandwidth. Justified, I would say. Carefully so because one wants to be firm, but fair with something like this.

The Blogs look at McCain’s recent bombshell. No more, no less.

Today’s Papers has a recent debate between Clinton and Obama, note that the plan to help homeowners whose mortgages are worth more than their homes is far from being implemented, lots of McCain tidbits and more in the one page news.

Amusements

Neurotically Yours: Conspire to Rewire

“My shirt got stuck in my zipper,” he said “I don’t wear drawers. When I tried to put it back, it was too late.” Penis

Police Department anonymously receives golden plaques that exclaim “Congratulations – You’re corrupt”, vow to find the sender and charge him with felony harassment

Not news: Boy, 13, describes principal as child molester in fake MySpace profile. News: Kid gets expelled. Fark: Young parodist files federal lawsuit claiming his free speech rights have been violated

After being banned from a local mall, teens plan boycott of said mall. Yeah, that’ll teach those store owners

RIAA training video: Music piracy is a gateway to drug dealing and terrorism

Woman “loses” wedding ring in the snow, at her home. If only there was a process to adjust the internal energy of a solid substance to a specific temperature until it changes to a liquid phase. If only

“Man waits turn in line, robs bank”

Labelling your shotgun shells “for cops” may not help you in court when pleading not guilty to attempted murder

Toddler’s Elmo Knows Your Name doll becomes possessed by Satan, makes death threats against Captain Kirk

Grotesquely obese man doesn’t understand all the fuss after he called fire crews four times in a week to help him stand up. “Sometimes I slide to the floor in my living room, and it’s hard to get back up,” he explains

Former mayor sentenced to two months in jail for stealing city funds, with which he bought a refrigerator, women’s underwear, hair dyes, and a Darth Vader voice distorter. The dumbass is strong with this one

Fark Photoshop Challenge: Photoshop this horrible mutant lovecraftian lemon

Fark Photoshop Challenge: Photoshop this sleepy baby

Fark Photoshop Challenge: Photoshop this lovely selection of plastic food

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