Theme – Ren’s Fears

Q. What are you afraid of?

That’s an interesting question because when it comes to big fears, I don’t have too many. Primarily, I don’t like pain. In specific, I can’t stand needles. I can look at them and be around them, but once one is being employed against me, I don’t want anything to do with it. It’s a light aversion, as when it comes right down to it, I’ll grudgingly give in.

I’m also one to be a bit anxious when I’m in a new place that I don’t know well, without a guide. That little anxious burning in the pit of one’s stomach, you know? Of course, when it comes to going somewhere new, I tend to be very focused on getting directions beforehand and planning. Once I’ve made a trip a few times, I don’t tend to freak any longer.

I tend to get nervous when I’m in a rough neighborhood or any place that ‘screams’ danger. Alleys, poorly developed areas and other such places. I’m a somewhat tall, relatively thin guy with no discernable combat skills and no desire to get shaken down. I tend to look very closely when I’m walking around in the dark and am extra aware more often than not because of that anxiety.

Beyond that, I meet most things with general neutrality. Most of the big fears like death and disease are simply not enough of an impact on my life to be feared. I know, on an intellectual level, that my time in existence is short, but the fifty+ years that will be it’s span are just too long of a time to start worrying about it. I know the world is a dangerous place and some drunk ass could swerve and clobber me. But, in life, there is only so much you can do to make yourself safe and avoid dangers before you begin to let the potential for danger damage the normal stride of your days.

Fearing things like that is too much bother when, if one of them were to happen, it would be unlikely that I could have planned in such a way as to avoid them. I don’t carelessly throw myself in the way of them, but beyond prudent caution and just care taken, I tend to let such fears slip behind me. I’ve got too much living to do to worry about dying.