2/26/04

Today was an interesting day. When I got into work I went over and saw my old boss. We went down to the cafeteria and talked for over an hour, she really didn’t want to see me leave. She kept saying “If you leave, which I hope you don’t”. She gave me a lot of ideas and mentioned some ideas and stuff that if chuck would go for them would solve most of my problems. After we finished talking I talked to my hubby for awhile and then finally got the courage to go talk to my new boss by myself. Well, it wasn’t so much that I got the courage, it was that I just knew what I had to do so I made myself go up there and do it. I told him I wanted to resign and that I was burnt-out. I was honest and told him that part of it was his management style. Why lie? He seemed willing to work on his management style and stuff but I said that I still wanted to go and that the other part of it was that I want to pursue a degree in psychology, I told him that honestly computers aren’t what I want to do long-term. He seemed accepting of those answers and said that was fine but that I couldn’t resign today, he wants me to sleep on it. I have to give him a written resignation with basically a proposal of what I’m willing to do. I can leave straight away, I can give my two weeks or I can offer to stay full time until he finds someone else. I also have the option of whether or not I want to come back to help train whoever they hire. Right now I’m leaning towards giving my two weeks and offering to come back and train whoever they hire on. That two weeks also includes taking any vacation time I have. I currently have two earned days so two weeks will actually be 8 days, not 10. I’m also toying with the idea of staying until they hire someone else on just because the money would be nice and I think I’ll feel better knowing I’m leaving. I also found out today that it was the last day I have to really deal with Marlene, she’s handing her phone directory responsibilities to HR, that’s part of why I’m considering staying on until they hire someone full-time. Or maybe I’ll just stay until April 1st or something like that. Thing is, we’re hoping to refinance our equity loan to get a better rate and it’d be best if I were employed until that happens. I’ll have to talk to my hubby some more about all that tonight.

All in all I feel better, I feel like I’ve taken ahold of my future. I think I really needed something to come along and make me really want to take a risk and go for my dreams. I e-mailed the person I know that started up a doggy daycare to see if she needs help. If she doesn’t maybe I’ll apply at a different doggy daycare, or something. *shrugs* I don’t really know yet. I’ll start looking at financial aid and student loans and see about getting myself into college too.

I felt so amazingly empty yesterday, I couldn’t even feel. Today I feel alive.

I also found out I have more in common with my old boss than I thought. After we talked about work we sat and talked about just stuff. She complained about some of her work related problems. We joked about the corporate environment and how people act all kiss-assy around upper management and how incredibly boring the holiday parties here are and stuff like that. We talked about moving and traveling. She told me about how she had trouble making friends in CT, she’s originally from Ohio. I told her about my trouble with making friends. We talked about how my husbands boss is a ‘tard. We talked about vegetarianism, apparently she’s been a vegetarian for several years and she offered to loan me some of her cook-books. Just anything and everything, it was fun and it makes me sad to leave. I will miss her, and there’s one other person there that I’ll kind of miss. That’s okay though, I’ll see them from time to time I’m sure.

We also picked the kittens up from the vet this afternoon. Chester and Oliver are doing okay, Amy seems sore and woozy. I felt so bad, she started up the stairs, stumbled and tumbled down about 4 stairs, it was one of those moments where all you could do was watch and hope for the best. She was shaken but okay. We took Sophie in for her distemper shot as well. We noticed she has a Caution on her paperwork, it said ***Caution: Handle with Care***. Sophie doesn’t do well around people she isn’t comfortable with, claws and teeth come out at the vet and she’s poised to strike at any moment. She’s doing really well around us though, we haven’t had any big problems with her, though she likes to attack our guests. 🙂

Anyway, this is getting quite long so I’m going to end it. 🙂