stress level at maximum capacity

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 On another note, the  lunch at Lawry’s was decent. It wasn’t really AMAZING. but it was tasty and the conversation was good.

too bad it’s sitting at the back of my throat waiting to get hurled into a toilet.

wheeee!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sometimes, I just NEED to be left alone.

It’s really bad when you cringe and get physically ILL whenever your phone rings.

it’s bad when you want to cry because you have to check your voicemail.

it’s bad when you wish you’d just die so you didn’t have to think.

that’s the point I’ve reached.

it’s ridiculous.

my children are going to give me an ulcer and I’m gonna die.

I feel HORRIBLE for leaning SO MUCH on Baboo lately. He’s been taking the extreme brunt of all of my stressed out moments and he’s been awesome, but I have to figure out a way to stop it or hide it or deal with it better because I know he doesn’t deserve to be pressured with my madness all the time.

I know that before we moved in together I could have my alone time to wail and scream and throw things and go deep deep under my blankets and sob.

but now I go to the bathroom and I know he knows something is up.

and it’s like… i don’t KNOW what to do.

I want all of this to stop.

I am just sick to death of it all.

I feel like throwing up my lunch right now because the school just called me.

it was the nurse asking for Jacobs physical exam documentation that has been sent to schools THREE TIMES now and they don’t file it or pass it along or SOMETHING and I really don’t FEEL LIKE BEING BOTHERED.

And my brother STILL needs to get his immunizations but I keep forgetting. I’m sure he already got them, but could anyone be bothered to put them into the computer? GUESS NOT.

I just want to throw up.

I want this OVER WITH.

done done done. bye bye. beat it. hit the road. dont’ come back. don’t let the door hit ya where the Lord split ya.

GET OUT OF MY LIFE STRESS.

I have reached my limit.

and it’s sad. Because rather than spend good quality time with my  kids and enjoy myfamily, i run and hide in video games and facebook applications because it allows me to shut off that part of me that is worried and bothered and frazzled into a million frayed pieces.

There has to be a way out of this.

I can’t take too much more.