Bullets in Reverse

whyyyy!

Instead of a normal chronological entry, I’m gonna work backwards.

BULLET STYLE *ZIP ZING!*

*I’m at work. I don’t know what I have to do, but I’m sure something will come up.

*I want to stream Kroq at work to hear the Weird Al interview, but I don’t want to get caught. We’re not allowed to stream radio cuz it clogs up the bandwidth.

*I actually got to work on time, but I had to drive for the 4th time this week. NOT SAVING ME MONEY.

*I didn’t save money again by going to Starbucks and getting a java chip frappucino. I have been craving one all week and it’s everything I wanted and more. MMMMM!

*Why did I drive? Well, we haven’t been leaving the house on time. I might have made it to the train today, but I stepped in DOG SHIT and had to go back in the house and change my shoes. FUCK ME.

*I didn’t sleep well last night. I kept waking up. The dog was restless and I kept hearing his collar jingle (he has like 3 tags on it, ID, License, and Microchip tags). I remembered that his bed wasn’t in his crate so I went to get it and he settled down. Poor thing. I had weird dreams about art and going "inside" of it. I don’t know.

*I got pissed off at Baboo last night but I just wasn’t in the mood to hash it out so I ended up turning away from him and going to sleep. He was super affectionate and cuddly but it wasn’t doing anything for me, just pissing me off more. I know he feels bad about things and we should have talked about it, but I just didn’t want to have the conversation. I’m hormonal and bitchy and it would have gone wrong. Maybe tonight. Maybe not. Maybe I’ll be over it before tonight.

*Baboo made a cute decision. He was supposed to be hanging out with his friend. Today would be the really only good c hance since Friday might be a date night for his friend. Baboo chose to spend the night with me instead. He wants us to have our last "kid free night" together. It would have been a super sweet thing if I wasn’t peeved at him right now.

*We went to dinner at Chili’s. We got the 2 for $20 deal. Pretty decent. good food. I have a lot of leftovers for my lunch (steak jalapeno quesadilla). Next time I’ll get ribs.

*I picked Baboo up from work and he revealed something to me about why he was so sick. I thought I knew, but I didn’t know all of it. I give him props for being completely honest with me, I’m glad… but it made me really upset. I tried to stuff it down and not let him see because I don’t want him to see that sort of thing effecting me in any way. but it was hard. I didn’t want to look at him.

*I went home last night before picking up Baboo and did the dishes and walked the dog… even though the entire way there I just fantasized about playing my video game. I will get some time to play tonight before Baboo gets home, so no biggie.

I think that’s it.

this week has been sorta shitty.

tomorrow I get my kids and Saturday is gonna be Harry Potter and a Costco shopping trip. My kids might end up staying home for the next three weeks… I dunno. My step mom still wants me to pay her $1000 bucks but I won’t have that much. I think I’ll have 700. Getting food into my house is more important. And spending 40 bucks on a movie is just something I want to do, it IS my money after all.

I’ll just have to pay her the other 300 gradually. One thing that sorta makes me sad about my family is that they ARE so focused on money when they help me. I wish they  just wanted to HELP ME, but they only do that when I’m crying and falling apart. Maybe I should do that more. Instead, she’ll bug me and look at me sad and make me feel guilty for not being able to follow through on all the money. But if my brother stays with me the next 3 weeks (which I think he will) then why not save it? He won’t even LET ME pay him. I offered him $200 and he said he would only take $50… so yeah. That works out well. I’ve decided that if I dont’ hear anything by Friday  next week I’m gonna go down in person to the DCFS and talk to someone and try to get something moving on this case. We need his things and I need guardianship and we need to get him ready to go to school in the fall. I want this settled so I can make the right plans.

ANYWAY.

I should go do work.

The renovations are moving along, but no more pain THANK GOODNESS!!!!

I’m happy it’s Thursday, but it’s still an evil armpit.