MY GRANDSON IS TEN
Yesterday was my grandson’s birthday. He turned ten! For whatever reason I don’t feel the same connection to him that I always did. Maybe it’s because I am not picking him up from school and spending time with him the way I use to. I just don’t want to. Part of the reason is that I would have to take my other two grandchildren and I just don’t feel that I have the same energy that I use to. It means picking them up twice a week. It also means leaving my hubby here alone twice a week. I guess I could just take them out for a shorter period of time but for whatever reason I don’t want to. I am being drained by my visits to the hospital. Maybe I should limit my visits. I do like my friends but am I going so everyone thinks I am “wonderful.”
I have been doing the WII instead of going swimming. Part of the reason is that I am too lazy. The other reason is that I feel I should be here with my hubby. Yesterday he knew I was going to a store with my friend so he went to hit balls with his woman friend. I don’t know why I just can’t accept that they are JUST friends. I am sure that’s all it is but it still bothers me. I can’t let it go.
We went to my son’s last night for my grandson’s birthday. I didn’t particularly enjoy it. WHY?????? It was relaxing! I just didn’t enjoy being with them for whatever reason. I think I am CRAZY! One thing bothered me but it shouldn’t. For appetizers they served delly and cheese. In the Jewish religion we don’t serve meat and dairy together. Why would they do it? To me it’s like a slap in the face. I know I do not care anymore about religion but I was just upset by it. Maybe I care more than I think.
We have no plans for the day today. We are going out for supper with another couple. I don’t know what we will do today.
I am still crocheting my cushion. I am about half way through. This piece is not coming out flat. I know it doesn’t matter but I still want it flat. I am not sure what I am doing wrong. I think I will try to decrease the stitches.
So I think I will do some crocheting and then go back to bed.
Don’t stop going where you like and doing what you like just to keep him from wanting to golf with his woman friend….cuz if you do, you will be depriving YOU of the things YOU like to do! And that would be a shame. I don’t blame you for not feeling like spending as much time with the grandkids as you used to. Kids become less fun as they get older. And we tire more easily as we get older! Those are just facts of life and not things we should feel guilty about. ;o) !! About the food not being what the Jewish religion says it ought to be…..well, you say you don’t believe in God or the religion per se, so what does it matter? I do understand that, God or no God, it is the heritage of the Jewish/Hebrew people as well, not “just” their religion. But modern-day people (Jews and everyone else) are so different from the people who lived a thousand or more years ago; maybe it’s ok to stop following some of those rules from back then. hugs, Nicky
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ryn: thanks for the advice about lists!! I am going to leave them a list before I go out today!! hugs, Nicky
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Happy birthday to your grandson! What are you crocheting at the moment? I haven’t crocheted in ages. Perhaps I should begin a scarf in preparation for Winter. RYN: I appreciate your note – thank you. This is actually the second therapist I’ve been seeing. I saw the first one for a couple of years and have been seeing this one for a couple of years. They’ve both been invaluable,the current one especially so. 🙂
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You know as much as you love your grandson, there are times you need to do things for you. Don’t feel bad for that as it is normal to need some time for yourself. There will still be special times you can spend with your grandson. My grandchildren mean the world to me but sometimes I need time for just me. It is alright to feel like this. You ever need to vent I am here. Love,
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try not to take everything so personally…..people eat what they choose to, and I think also younger generations have no idea how our energy wains as we get older. I find evening functions are a greter effort to attend thse days so don’t beat yourself up for not enjoying the party. I can’t believe your grandson is 10. It reminds me how long I have been writing on OD as I recall your feelings shared when he was a baby. hang in there, hugs p
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It doesn’t seem like you and your husband have that much in common anymore, people drift apart after so many years together esp once the kids grow up, it isn’t a big deal it happens to most everyone. Live your life and let him live his. If you really can’t take it then leave.
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