FOR NOW
For now I will do nothing as usual about my situation. I will NOT talk to my hubby or that’s what I’m thinking right now. I am worried about rocking the boat. Do I want to live alone?
A few weeks ago my son said that Dad always does what he wants. I guess he sees that his father does whatever he wants whenever. Is it my fault? Am I too independent? Am I too stubborn to want to do things when he wants to? On the other hand is he too selfish and blind to see that I have been hurting for a long time? I go along with what he wants a lot of the time but maybe not with the major issues like leaving for Florida at the end of October. He knows I don’t enjoy being at the trailer. Does he ever once acknowledge it or try to help me have a good time? NEVER!!!!!!! He just sits an does his puzzle and then gets together with his friends. Does he think I enjoy being alone so doesn’t try? Maybe it’s time he knew how I really felt. I should probably get a lot off my chest and tell him and let the rocks fall where they may. Other women go it alone so probably I could too.
It’s only 6:15 and I’m up. I’m so tempted to just pack and leave for the city. However, I don’t want to have anyone and everyone talking so I’ll just stay. It doesn’t really matter as I’ll have breakfast, do the WII and spend a couple of hours here.
I will not be doing much with Herbalife in the near future. My sponsor told me that I wasn’t calling enough. He’s probably right. I am suppose to be making calls every hour on the hour. It’s just not for me as much as I would like it to be. Boy it would be wonderful to make some money. BUT I would have to get some new leads and I don’t want to spend the money so I will just sit tight.
So that’s the story as it unfolds. Have a great day.
nothing can be resolved without communication…so think about how to say what you need to, without hostility or blame. If you use “I” statements about how you feel, when talking to him, it shouldn’t create a nasty reaction….that will happen only if you cast blame. hugs P
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You need to discuss these things with your husband, however I would not expect much.It is unlikely that he is going to change at this stage if the game. As I said either you can accept it or not, it is really all about you, not him.
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People don’t change. If he likes to go the trailer and there are people for him to interact with, I would do my own thing. If it doesn’t bother you to be alone, I would do what made me happy.
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I’ve been reading you for years too and this is a recurring theme. Your hubby is not going to change. You can go on as you are and live essentially separate lives or go to a divorce attorney and see what kind of settlement you would get. I am not familiar with Canadian divorce laws. In the meantime, don’t do anything YOU don’t want to do, such as go to the trailer. 68 is not too late to get some happiness out of life.
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I think you realize that he thinks very differently than you think and you assume a lot about his thinking that might not be true. I think the two of you have a long history of non-communication. Have you considered trying to get him to counseling to learn communication?
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All of your noters have good advice. Clamming up and not talking isn’t the best course of action. It can cause a lot of stress resulting in health problems. Get it off your chest.
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RN: Men aren’t smart enough to know something is wrong unless you draw a picture for them with fat crayons and stick people laying it all out. You have to talk to him unless you want to continue to settle for unhappiness for the rest of your life. Good luck! P.S. Some of us even have to resort to finger paint…make sure you have some handy in case the crayons are too complex! 😛
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