In the Heat of the Day

I’m sure my dad would have approved of the 101 degree record high that the Twin Cities had on the 4th of July. He was born on the 4th of July and always was a hot summer person who enjoyed having his fireworks and cake, too.

From my earliest memory, our family always had a party on his birthday, and as well as using the occasion to celebrate our country’s founding, and as I got older, the parties grew larger and longer and more exciting.

My parents put in a backyard pool in the late 70s and from that point on, the 4th of July birthday party took off like a rocket (pardon the pun). My dad’s celebrations included a day long pool party with lots of food, grilling, croquet, and good conversation. As we waited for dark to come, the anticipation would grow for our homegrown fireworks extravaganza, and finally, and we never outgrew this, running around the front yard with sparklers twitching little white lights that bounce into the night.

Even though it was my dad’s birthday, my mother with her incredible social skills and networking techniques, was the glue who held the party together. She died in 1983 and we tried for a couple of years to have our own party, but it didn’t work. The same people gathered, we did the same things, but the whole party fell flat and we gave up.

The mid-summer magic was gone.

Since my dad died, we’ve tried to find the magic once again. We’ve tried beach parties, picnics at the zoo, going to Twins games, gathering with family, gathering with friends, and picnics in my massive garage.

We went back to basics this year.

We gave up the croquet tournament for swimming. It was actually too hot for swimming. It was too hot to leave the air conditioned house. But we bravely put on our swimming suits, grabbed our towels, and drove up the hill to the city pool.

We lounged there all day. We slipped in and out of the water whenever we got hot, which was all the time, so we were in the water a lot.

Then we drove back down the hill, settled ourselves into our air conditioned house, I had the veggies, fruit, chips, and baked beans all ready to go. I love the 4th, because it’s so easy to do. It’s not like Thanksgiving and Christmas where everything comes out of the oven at the same time and it’s a rush to get it on the table before it gets cold.

No, the 4th is easy and relaxed.

I don’t drink anymore and Susan doesn’t drink, but the alcoholics in the group, which unfortunately includes my son, lit up like the sparklers of the night when a friend brought in a cooler of beer and other stuff. Their grumpiness disappeared as soon as the alcohol slipped down their throats.

As a non-drinker, it always amazes me how people need alcohol to function in social settings. I’m the shyest person in the world, and yet I’ll force myself to converse, and if I feel uncomfortable, I just leave.
The parties of my parents’ past included beer, but the guys might have nursed a beer for an entire summer afternoon. I can’t remember anyone ever drinking more than a beer or two at my dad’s birthday bashes. The women never drank. Alcohol was not the reason to get together, fun and sober enjoyment of each other’s company was.

But the alcoholics in yesterday’s group did not go overboard and kept it together. Thank goodness.

My son’s girlfriend’s daughter just turned two (no, she is not his), and after a hot afternoon at the pool, where she burned the bottoms of her feet walking on the hot cement), dinner, playing with the kids, and her first exposure to low key fireworks, we trudged through the heat and humidity and walked the half block to the park.

The boys and I went to Wisconsin this past Sunday and bought our illegal fireworks and now was the time to set them off.

Our fireworks show was a slow and laborious one, with long pauses to light the fuses of the “big guns.” We were sweltering in the oppressive humidity. “Please move this along,” we begged. Finally, it was the grand finale and the two year old clapped and cheered.

We bagged up our trash and trudged home.

And everyone left.

And that was it, just a good old basic American 4th of July. We had heat, sun, swimming, grilling, fun, and fireworks.

Not quite as magical as my childhood 4ths, but almost.