In a hurry…going nowhere

It’s wayyyy past my bedtime.  My mind knows it, yet i have this nervous energy that i’m trying to wind down.

J’s been constantly on my mind because of his health.  I’m trying hard to keep up with his dr’s appts so i’ll know the latest…and have a clue what’s happening.

He went back to his GP yesterday and got blood tests back that confirmed what his dr’s had suspected.  “It” (his word) has spread from his pancreas to his liver (when i asked what “it” was, his usual denial of “whatever’s in my pancreas” was the answer).  He also has jaundice, which seems incredibly minor at this point.  And they haven’t even started on finding out why he’s steadily had blood in his urine for a month now.

He hurts– all the time.  His specialist told him he thinks that the polyps on his pancreas are pressing on his stomach.  If he eats, he pays for it, no matter how bland the food.  There doesn’t seem to be any relief for him…and i feel incredibly bad…and sad…and scared.

He’s still waiting for his referral to go to the doc in Atlanta.  The gov’t folks are trying to rush everything forward,  but, as the gov’t usually goes, there’s lots of red tape.  His specialist wanted him in for his Atlanta appt last week.

I feel a little sick about the whole thing…most of the time…

And then there’s the news i got from Ant today that Kim wants him to keep in touch with me so she can be sure j’s not holding back on what he knows from her…

And i’ve decided, after talking to Ant, to call her.  We have common interests, if nothing else.

And then, there’s Jimmie, who can’t forgive or accept his father.

I’m thankful to have faith in God.

Sleep sweet, ya’ll!!

Blessed be!!