No, Solitare, you may not run away.

Such a day. Such a week. I feel very strongly about this running away thing, if my parents hadn’t raised me to be responsible, I’d be out of here! Did I mention hubs sinus surgery yet? Well he had it Tues. and to be fair, they pretty near had to turn his poor nose inside out to get all the pollups out and to shave off the bone spur thingy (OUCH), so yes, his nose is sore. Did I mention his nose is sore? I mean his nose IS REALLY REALLY SORE! Got it? ‘Cuz I’ve heard that now, oh, say 1,222,234 times. Oy.

Ok, I understand pain, honest. I mean, I DID have a C section, where they cut a long line, took my innards and an 8# child out, put the innards back in and stapled me shut. I know pain. I sympathize. But I swear I did not bitch as much as I’ve heard about my husbands nose already. Where is my big, strong, SILENT husband???!!! And who’s the whiner with the nose?

Then, today, Carl hurt his back, badly. He came home early. His back also hurt REALLY bad. Chels wants SIM’s and cannot live with out it. Brie came home ornery from work and Logan is teething.

I have shut myself in the office and I may never come out again. The only one I still have really strong, loving feelings for is Logan. *L* He’s just little and his mouth hurts-he doesn’t know why either, he’s allowed to whine! Calgon take me away. But, no, I can’t go into the bathroom, they all (well, not Carl) feel free to come in and perch on the john, and I would just hear more about the nose, the day, SIMS and other things no one should have to hear this much-even in a tub full of bubbles.

Hmpf.

Ok, I just had to get that out. Now I can really bitch and moan. *snort* Well, seriously, if you’ve ever had a sick husband, you know what I mean. Whine, whine, whine, pissandmoan, sigh, sigh, sigh. They’d die, actually DIE to have a child. Labor would kill them. Shit, Braxton-Hicks would prob. do them in. I have been patient, well, it started getting hard yesterday, but still I have been very patient. I DID feel so bad for him, just thinking about it made my nose hurt in sympathy pain-ugh…it sounded awful. I wait on him hand and foot, listen to the litany of woes. I bring him food on a little tray. He’s been ensconsed in his throne…er, chair, now since we got home on Tues. With the tv changer in his hand. AND he doesn’t like me to leave the room. My sympathy is draining away I can tell you that.

Ahhhh, good times, good times.

I’m one of those people that could have a no whining sign everywhere, in every room, my car, on shirts, etc. It just makes my skin crawl. Bitching, that doesn’t bother me, everyone needs to bitch a little sometimes, but the whining. *shudder* Just makes my skin crawl. Seriously. I have issues with it. *g* He has to sleep in his recliner, absolutely must not bump his nose, (OH DEAR GOD NO! DO NOT PROLONG THIS) So I sleep on the couch. This is expected. Well, I, good little wifey, piped up right away that first day that I’d sleep on the couch…so now it appears I will until he can come to bed. I honestly don’t mind this, except for the fact I never get any time alone. That is hard for me. But, I have escaped! Look at me!

It was a shitty day I guess. Knocked me right over the edge. Again, I got nothing done. My decorations are still up. Mocking me. I watched Logan, waited on hubs, listened to hubs, sat with hubs, did 5 loads of laundry, took Carl to Doc. Waited for him. Took him to get his prescription. Finished picking up messy house. Got groceries. Made supper. And it was one of those days (weeks) where everything you go to do takes an hour longer then usual. So, altho’ I did basically nothing-I’m exhausted. And a touch crabby. ( oh really?!) To the point of, if one more person, or animal, sticks their head in my office door and asks me one more thing I am going to blow like St. Helena’s.

Hmmmm, strange. I, who hates whining, in fact stated it again above, have whined my way through an entire entry. You see what life has reduced me to? Oh for fucks sake. Oops. Don’t tell, I have resolved to cut down on my cussing for New Year’s. Maybe I need to add whining to the list. I’ve actually been bitching my fool head off, but in rereading, it sounds whiny.

At any rate, I feel ever so much better now. Ahhhh. Please pray for my husbands healing. I’d hate to see almost 20 years of marriage go down the tubes over a sinus operation. He’s been crabby for the whole last year over this sinus thing, so my feelings for him could go either way at this point! Ha. (pretty sure I’m joking.) 😉

On to other things…I ran into a friend of mine today in the grocery store. Well of course I did. I looked like hell. Not a lick of make up on. Hair slammed up into a clip. Hadn’t seen her for a couple of years. Isn’t that just the way??? Anyway, she thought I looked great, she hadn’t seen me since I’d lost the weight. It was good to see her. The last couple of years I’ve been so busy, and in part have isolated myself. I’ve lost touch with a lot of people. The thing is, going through hard times, when you prob. need people around the most, you *do* isolate. After a while, you just don’t speak the same language anymore. With Brie and treatment, etc., then Dad, and the other smaller things that have happened, we’ve had alot. So. Anyway, I’m glad I saw her and mentioned that hubs was playing at a club nearby next month, and maybe the old gang could get together. She loved the idea so maybe we can sort of pick up where we left off with everyone, now. That’s another resolution.

I don’t usually make New Year’s Resolutions. But this year thought, what the hell…and made a few. There are some things I simply need to pay serious attention to. They haven’t made a safe cigarette, so I’ll have to quit. Dammit. I don’t want Logan’s first word to be Dammit, so I have to quit cussing. Dang nab it. See? Things like that. Sigh. Going to be *such* a fun year. Heh.

Oh, I think I hear the sweet sound of my darling husbands voice. Yes. He wants me to watch Notting Hill. That’s a good one, some people hate Hugh Grant, but he cracks me up. Humor sounds like just the thing here. *w*

Thanks for listening. I want to wish a Happy, Happy New Year to a group of wonderful people I am honored to call my friends. Thank you all so much for the laughter, the joy, the tears and the support. I feel lucky I have found this place and you.

Love,

 

 

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January 2, 2004

Ah, I love you, sisterfriend – even just listening to you RANT (and EVERYONE needs a good rant now & again) makes me feel better. I’m sick, eh? LOL But we ARE feeling better, thank You thank YOU!!! 🙂 LOVE YOU, Happy New Year!!

Don’t be silly…you’re not whining at all. You’re bitching. And that’s okay. You said so your own self! I’m sorry. Truly, truly sorry this week has sucked so bad. Wish I could fix you a nice cup of coffee and give you a big hug and have a visit. Maybe hubs could use a hockey mask – yanno like Silence of the Lambs??? I love you….

January 3, 2004

You have all my sympathy… I cannot imagine J having the same surgery. I have almost killed him when he whines over a COLD… *sigh* How on Earth did men come to be known as the “stronger sex”????

oh no!!! my heart goes out to you! Praying for his speedy recovery.

January 4, 2004

Well I’m surprised you got peace to write that whole entry!! You are a good wife – I’d have been up in the bed – no problem! I sincerely hope 2004 is a much better year for you & I’m so glad you’ve got that wee man in your life to balance it all out. I’m also glad he’s got you in his life! Lucky boy.

January 4, 2004

Happy New Year!

January 4, 2004

GET THEE OUT TO A BOOKSTORE, Pick up a Dr. Seuss book (Hop on Pop would be great to start) and START READIN’ ‘EM TO THAT CHILD!!! (or, give me a mailing address & I’ll mail ya one.) 🙂

January 6, 2004

RYN: It’s 28 here right now… I’d never survive MN weather any more! I’m a cold weather wimp now… 😉

Poor hubs! But poor you, too! Hang in there, my dear. It can only get better, right?

January 12, 2004

Hope everyone is feeling better!!!

I sure miss you and your writing. Hope all is well. xo

January 18, 2004

OK, how did I miss this entry???? This makes my nose hurt to read it, but I admire your patience with him! I’m a horrible nurse, hate whining, and would never have been able to stand that for long. Hope he’s totally recovered by now! They’re bad enough when they just have a cold.