theme of the week

I love the theme of the week, this week. If you were given $100K what would you do. I’ve been given $100K a few times in the last five years. Now given, earned but in my line of work you get paid in big chunks rather than a weekly salary. So it always feels like you’re being given this huge chunk of money. Every single time the same thing has happened, I put a quarter into savings and then half gets eaten up with taxes, agent, manager, lawyer and accountant fees. So essentially I wind up with just $25K. I’m not complaining. The savings is for old age — assuming that fucking banks still exist then.
I don’t have any debt, which is nice. I’m lucky that way. I don’t live beyond my means… most of the time. If I had 100K free and clear. I’d probably give it away to charity. No. bullshit. I’d put 50K aside for my inevitable disc replacement surgery in Germany. I’m so fucked. This is the thing, 100K can’t solve what’s wrong with my life (or anyone’s life for that matter). It’s a nice chunk of change and it may reduce some stress in your life but you are you and no amount of money will fix that.
In 2005 I was in the deepest depression of my life. I had also just been hired by Sony to write a film. There was a check for 80K sitting on my dining room table and I thought, "shit, I guess I have to go to the bank." I was so fucking depressed that the thought of driving to the bank to deposit a fucking huge ass check was bumming me out. Can you imagine? What a bag of shit!
Now my career is kind of in the toilet. I mean i’m okay but I’m barely okay. I take solace in the fact that the entire industry is a wreck and the only people getting jobs these days are the ones adapting Easy Bake Oven and Battleship into features for the 18 to 24 year old demo who will only go to see movies about pre-sold franchises. They want to know the movie before they see the movie. At $12 a ticket I can’t really blame them. Plus everything’s so fucking depressing these days, I’d want to know what I was getting into before I paid. I’d hate to sit halfway through a movie to discover it is bumming me out even more.
Here’s something that’s worth more than 100K: look around you. What are five things you’re grateful for? Go outside if you can. On a bright clear day, look at the sky. Look at the powerlines against the blue. Look at the cypress trees and the bue recycling bins. Look at how amazingly beautiful it all is right this instant. This moment, this moment right now is all you have and only you decide if it’s going to be a good moment or a bad moment. I am in all kinds of pain right now, both physical and emotional and i am overwhelmed by how beautiful the world is. I go outside, I lay in bed. I am surrounded by beauty. And no, I am not on anything stronger than Tylenol right now so put that out of your mind. Every moment is beautiful if you let yourself see it.

1. Blankets
2. My dog snoring beside me
3. Ice packs
4. Netflix instant view of MST3K
5. The soup a friend brought over this morning for me
6. Teaching classes while laying on a beach chair – And the school is cool with that
7. My walks
8. The EMG test that showed very little nerve damage
9. My Jack Kornfield MP3’s
10. Genissen