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I’ve come to find, for better or worse, when I shut my eyes to fill my head with sleep, all around what [mine] can see closed, strung up like holiday lights or animals on hooks, dangling, is all of us with our matching memberships (for better or for worse), and the… the counterbalance, for…
waiting…
I had a mammogram done Wednesday along with 2 pelvic and abdominal ultrasounds. They are checking for cancer. In my breast they found 2 lumps and none on the other side, in that breast I have been having pain. My pelvic area i have had pain so bad that it brings me to a hunched over fetal po…
The early 2000s
He cheated on me with Margo!!! I felt betrayed. I felt violated. He was the last person I knew to be a cheater. I was hurt. I stayed busy with work. I spent my weekends away in a bigger city. Which is where my brother moved too. So clubbing. Drugs. Drinking. Sex. I didn’t want commitmen…
Saturday 4/27/24
6;00a.m.I went without water all night. The aide just brought a pitcher of water. My mouth is a sandbox. I didn’t get very good care either. I went without getting changed. I’m soaked but I wont get help until after breakfast. My night wasn’t good at all. At least I slept with no weird dream…
my day
Two of my friends confessed to me. One of the girls has a baby and shes taken, shes an irl friend and I’ve known her in high school. The other girl is someone I’ve been online friends with for years but I barely talk to them. I like the first girl, but she has a partner. The second girl isn’…
Enigmatic Star Dust – I never heard your voice
But your words are carved in my memory It’s not as if I had a choice My friend from the past century I never heard your voice … Poems for the hearts of your lost ones A craft to hide away the tears Who did you become this lifetime The summation of these passed years … I hope you’re loved whe…
For all the times
For all the times that people said I failed or came up short: I did my best and know what’s true Yes it led me far astray from you Set me away to swim in the blue Make me an enemy, what you have to do … But I loved you. And for all the times I said it to Myself, I’d hug you twice as much. …
Walking. Kind of.
Im pressed for time as company will be here shortly but im allowed to take like 10 to 15 steps a day. Its odd and feels weird but its progress. I gotta go. They just pulled up.
In another life
In another life, I would be sitting outside on my wrap around porch watching the kids play in the pool. I can hear the ocean waves off somewhere in the distance. I have been making good money since I got out of college when i was 21 so I’m only working part time hours now. My husband is bar-…
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There is something I want to say, not now, not today… I just feel so far away, drifting of. The reoccurring memory of my youth, sun setting in the laboratory of my father, the afternoon sun reflecting of the flasks… Could my life have been better? I miss the life I had.